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WTT for a rectal thermometer


Phantom

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I just have to add that used tampons can be recycyled as teabags for vampires.

 

 

Wow, now that is just too gross......really just too gross......

 

almost as gross as the boxes of used undies at Savers...and the person writing about that never mentioned the gloves he wore while sorting them....leading me to believe that there were no gloves worn....

Edited by RickHarrisMaine
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I just have to add that used tampons can be recycyled as teabags for vampires.

 

 

Wow, now that is just too gross......really just too gross......

 

almost as gross as the boxes of used undies at Savers...and the person writing about that never mentioned the gloves he wore while sorting them....leading me to believe that there were no gloves worn....

I never saw anyone wear gloves, like I said if I spotted a pair of nut smugglers then the whole box got chucked but several other employees would just tear into it like a treasure chest of priceless relics. They hired a lot of bums and dead beats when I was working there though :)

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I'm always confused by people who call thermometers "rectal thermometers". Why not just use the same thermometer for either end? :ponder:

 

Would you want it in your mouth after it's been in your rectum?

 

Oh, you're probably one of those germ freaks. ( ;) Please - I'm one of those people that like the idea of those towels that say "Face" on one end and "Butt" on the other)

Edited by atariman
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I'm always confused by people who call thermometers "rectal thermometers". Why not just use the same thermometer for either end? :ponder:

 

The bulb of a rectal thermometer is short and thick in order to protect the rectum. A long, slender bulb tip could accidentally injure the patient by penetrating the walls of the rectum. A blunt tipped thermometer is much less likely to damage the rectum. Remember, a thermometer with a long and slender bulb is definitely an oral thermometer while a thermometer with a short and thick bulb could be either an oral thermometer or a rectal thermometer.

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I'm always confused by people who call thermometers "rectal thermometers". Why not just use the same thermometer for either end? :ponder:

 

The bulb of a rectal thermometer is short and thick in order to protect the rectum. A long, slender bulb tip could accidentally injure the patient by penetrating the walls of the rectum. A blunt tipped thermometer is much less likely to damage the rectum. Remember, a thermometer with a long and slender bulb is definitely an oral thermometer while a thermometer with a short and thick bulb could be either an oral thermometer or a rectal thermometer.

 

See, but my point is this - why make a sharp, pointy version for your mouth? Why not make one safe thermometer? I mean, what if I happened to be walking down the street one day and decided to take my temperature (orally - it's hard to walk otherwise), some kid jumps out, I trip over him, and I fall? Boy, I think we'd all agree that we'd want a rectal thermometer in our mouths at that moment!... :ponder: ... somehow that doesn't sound quite right...

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I mean, what if I happened to be walking down the street one day and decided to take my temperature (orally - it's hard to walk otherwise), some kid jumps out, I trip over him, and I fall? Boy, I think we'd all agree that we'd want a rectal thermometer in our mouths at that moment!

:rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling: :rolling:

 

Ain't that the truth! I wish I had a nickel for every time that's happened! :D

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Well, what if I was taking my temperature rectally, then I went to sit down but someone yanked the chair out from under me and when I crashed down on the floor, and the thermometer bulb was so fat that it got stuck in my duodenum? I'm sure we'd all want to have an oral thermometer with the skinny bulb instead in that situation, right?

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Well, what if I was taking my temperature rectally, then I went to sit down but someone yanked the chair out from under me and when I crashed down on the floor, and the thermometer bulb was so fat that it got stuck in my duodenum? I'm sure we'd all want to have an oral thermometer with the skinny bulb instead in that situation, right?

 

You'd probably want one of These... :ponder:

(Actually they give them to women after just having a baby and you don't want to know how much perverse glee I take in posting it)

PS - Also can be used for Vamp Iced Tea :D

post-2879-1177042821_thumb.jpg

post-2879-1177042845_thumb.jpg

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when in need for a cold pack for the taint, a cheaper alternative is the Slurpee machine at 7-11, sometimes you can even get a discount if you forego the cup and just blast directly into the affected region (you may want to bring a friend to help with the operation of the machine unless you are particularly dextrous...but a lot of video gamers are, I suppose) - I recommend the Bruisin' Berry or Kryptonite Ice

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Since most of us are in to collecting classic stuff...thought yas might like this one (make sure to check it's condition):

 

Classic Rectal Medical Clinical Fever Thermometer

 

Or

 

We could all pitch in a get a lot (saves money that way ya know). They appear to be great for multiple orifice's and armpits.

 

100 NEW DIGITAL TEMP THERMOMETER ORAL RECTAL UNDERARM

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We could all pitch in a get a lot (saves money that way ya know). They appear to be great for multiple orifice's and armpits.

 

100 NEW DIGITAL TEMP THERMOMETER ORAL RECTAL UNDERARM

 

I dunno... seems a little complicated. How am I supposed to hold this in my mouth, rectum, and armpit at the same time? Seems like it might cause some situations similar to those mentioned above...

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How to get rid of stress using a Q-tip rectal thermometer

 

At a seminar called "Stress and Disease" by Dr. Nickolas Hall, an expert in psychobiology, gave an example of a coping skill for job stress.

 

When you have had one of those 'Take This Job And Shove It' days, try this:

 

On your way home after work, stop at your pharmacy and go to the section where they have thermometers. You will need to purchase a rectal thermometer made by "Q-tip". Be sure that you get this brand. When you get home, lock your doors, draw the drapes, and disconnect the phone so you will not be disturbed during your therapy.

 

Change to very comfortable clothing, such as a sweat suit and lie down on your bed. Open the package containing the thermometer, remove the thermometer, and carefully place it on the bedside table so that it will not become chipped or broken.

 

Take the written material that accompanies the thermometer and as you read it you will notice in small print the statement that says "every rectal thermometer made by Q-tip is PERSONALLY tested."

 

Now close your eyes and say out loud five times, "I am so glad that I do not work in quality control at the Q-tip company."

 

:)

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DisturbingAuctions usually has some twisted things

 

 

Like this

 

Or this

 

 

THis one is just goofy

Why do you get to choose the Co -worker? :ponder: Now if it was shoot person of my choosing I'd be all over that! ;) And you have to love the Wooden Woody! :cool: No batteries Included! May as well said one size fits all as well! :D :D :D

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