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SoundGammon

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Status Updates posted by SoundGammon

  1. I'm in a Rodney Dangerfield mood today, RIP. Thought up more one liners he could use if he we're around today.  "My wife's cooking is so bad our kids go running around to the neighbors and beg for leftovers!"  "One time I had a piece of meat that I could't eat so I tossed it to the dog...he tossed it back!"   "Awhile back and I put my plate on the floor for the dog and he bit me!"

     

    1. Show previous comments  7 more
    2. frankodragon

      frankodragon

      What a doctor I’ve got—he’s really mixed up. Last week, he grabbed my knee and told me to cough. Then he hit me in the balls with a hammer.

    3. x=usr(1536)

      x=usr(1536)

      I'm not a good-looking guy.  At Hallowe'en I open the front door and the kids give me candy!

    4. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      In fact, I was such an ugly kid that my parents had to hang a porkchop around my neck just to get the dog to play with me.

  2. "No time to do it right, but always time to do it over!"

    1. r_chase

      r_chase

      idk why but I feel like that's basically what's recently happening with some Atari 2600 games that never made it due to its initial 1992 discontinuation. This includes the latest Swordquest iirc.

  3. King Ghidorah...the original bobblehead!

  4. Here it is, Saturday afternoon, and I'm all set to watch the Mariners spring training baseball. Nope, can't do it! Only way to watch it is to subscribe to Fubo! Root Sports is busing interviewing the cook for the Seattle Kraken hockey team! What is WRONG with this picture?

    1. bent_pin
    2. SoundGammon

      SoundGammon

      To be fair, Root Sports was going to air a live NBA game with the UTAH JAZZ. A live REAL game has priority over warm-up games!

    3. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      Back in the good old days of C/Ku band dishes, you could see a lot of the uplink feeds. Those were a lot of fun because they were unfiltered and you could usually hear the announcers talking trash when the network went to commercial. 

  5. I just read that scientists in China have developed a disk the size of a DVD that will hold the equivalent of 220,000 dvds!  

    1. Show previous comments  13 more
    2. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      Well,  ya gotta see how it ends.

    3. carlsson

      carlsson

      The bloopers are at the end, right?

    4. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      Plus you might get a post credits scene,  probably just setting up the sequel...

  6. They say money talks, all mine ever says is goodbye!

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. dudeguy

      dudeguy

      I hear ya there

    3. Razzie.P

      Razzie.P

      Mine mixes it up a bit --

       

      So long, sucker!

       

      Hasta La Vista, Baby!

       

      I'll tell the ex you said "hi"

    4. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      Money Talks and people listen...

       

       

  7. What do you get if you put 2 pancakes together?  Two pancakes that are thicker than any Subway sandwich! Gotta pay big money to those football stars instead!

    1. RB5200

      RB5200

      Haven't eaten one in years, have they really gotten that bad.

    2. bent_pin
  8. "I'm not a fast bartender or a slow bartender...I'm a half-fast bartender!"

    1. Kiwi

      Kiwi

      I read that as half-ass bartender for some reason.

  9. Just not right....Darth Vader Valentines! Nooooo!

    1. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      No, I am you valentine!

    2. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      Search your feelings. You know it to be true.

    3. Kiwi

      Kiwi

      No!!! IT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!!

  10. What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste!

    1. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      Especially if you get them mixed up!

    2. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      If you ever think that your job is a pain in the butt, remember that each Johnson and Johnson rectal thermometer is personally tested and sanitized before packaging.

    3. thanatos

      thanatos

      My father joked about people bragging about their college degrees.  "A rectal thermometer has degrees, and look where that goes!"

  11. Right now the temperature outside is.... -38! Think I'll take a dip in the pool!

    1. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      C or F?  LOL

    2. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      The man is part atari and part polar bear

  12. Watching Real Genius on AMC, commercials outrun the movie! Channels like this ruin cable tv!

    1. Show previous comments  3 more
    2. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?

       

      Or,  another favorite line...Mitch : What are you doing? Chris Knight : Self-realization. I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, "... I drank what?"

    3. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      I want to see more of you around the lab.

       

      Fine, I'll gain weight.

    4. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      Why is that toy on your head?

       

      Because if I wear it any place else, it chafes.

  13. Egg Nog makes the best French Toast!

    1. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      Use a baguette and cut it on a bias, about 1" thick.

      Egg nog with cinnamon whiskey makes me good and toasty too.

    2. SoundGammon

      SoundGammon

      I get the pumpkin spice or the vanilla spice versions! Also some Texas Toast, thicker bread.

  14. My Halloween costume:  I go naked on a pair of roller skates and go as a "pull-toy"! Last year it was cold, but I stuck it out!

  15. If the government shuts down does that mean we stop paying taxes? No sense betting on a dead horse!

    1. r_chase

      r_chase

      Eh...I'm sure a smaller government will charge you a tax to an extent. If you want no taxes for your own micronation, good luck running it. lol

  16. "No work during drinking hours!"

    1. Kiwi

      Kiwi

      "Yes, otherwise you'll spill your drinks on your workstation."

  17. I am working on selling my 1978 GMC passenger van, "Mystery Machine"! And I was wondering what is good way to sell it nation wide because I don't to list it locally. Ebay?

    1. jhd

      jhd

      All of the listings that I have seen online for vehicles for sale are local or regional (within 150 miles). Of course I am just looking for something to get me to/from work and the grocery store, not something vintage or special.

       

      Are there any websites or other forums targeted at van collectors who may be interested in this type of vehicle? It is going to be a challenge to find a non-local buyer unless you have some specialized or niche vehicle that people really want. 

       

    2. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      None that costs any less than 35%. Barrett Jackson auction, or a company like Gas Monkey.

      I hate the idea of an ebay buyer making things difficult, they do that.

  18. The first thing I'm going to do tomorrow is sleep in!

    1. Charlie Cat

      Charlie Cat

      @SoundGammon A superb choice SG. Reminds me of a certain kitty cat that does the same. :D

       

      Field Theory with Katie Liggera: 8th September 1987

    2. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      If you're lucky you'll wake up just in time to take a nap.

      Tired Dog Days GIF

  19. Hey Spectrum/Charter!

    About your dispute with Disney, on the screens where the programming has been pulled, you said that it wasn't right Disney wanted people pay for channels they didn't want. Really? Here's what happened to me a couple of years ago when I wanted to add the NFL REDZONE to my subscription and your representative said I could only get it if I got the GOLD PACKAGE! I was forced to get a bunch of pay channels that I DIDN'T want just to watch some football! Good news is that TDS put a new line in my alley I will get ALL my services through them and drop you guys!

    1. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      WOOOHOOO!

       

      Best news ever SoundGammon!

       

      That is seriously what I'm talking about!

       

      I am Honestly happy for you!

       

      Can't wait for the day I post an announcement like this!  Spectrum,  hear me now,  your days are limited!!

    2. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      And Now my Spectrum bill has gone UP again!   What are they F-ing reading this?

  20. ESPN gone! Thanks a lot you greedy jerks at Disney! I cancelled my subscription to Disney+!  Also will boycott ALL Disney related stuff!

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      No sir, more meant to stick up for the consumers. Not a fan of the cable/dish companies either.

       

      Also, not a big fan of companies that continually raise prices in one area to combat losses in other areas. This having been stated before I was aware of ESPN being a loss-leader. However, many companies have divisions that operate at a loss and are supported because they bring customers to other areas.

       

      Still feels like all the money they've lost in their Florida park and on their current run of movies is, in no small part, responsible for this decision. As a publicly traded company, their responsibility is to make the best decisions for their shareholders. The actions leading to this decision do not appear to be in that trust and limiting their audience for advertisers to a private platform is likewise against the interest of their shareholders.

       

      Just my opinion though.

    3. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      I follow ya @bent_pin,  My comment was not directed to you.  I'm sure Spectrum worded their email/slates very passionately to all SPECTRUM subscribers that Evil corporation Disney was trying to raise their rates to poor lowly Spectrum, just caught in the crossfire as their poor employees and their families starved to death unable to pay out this ridiculous rate increase the likes of which they had never seen before...I guess my point is these disputes are absolutely nothing new...(Probably shouldn't say, but) I've ran my share of "lawyer worded" slates across channels as "Evil" content providers on all sides raise their rates unrealistically to poor satellite providers...Cable providers and specifically Spectrum (for Internet, Phone, TV etc.) are the Unequivocal absolute worst though...

    4. dudeguy

      dudeguy

      Disney is an absolute shit show of a company, spent billions buying up franchises, milking them for all their worth, putting out endless forgettable sequels, overpriced theme parks, they just dont know how to run a business

  21. I wish Subway would stop paying high priced celebrities and start putting more meat on their subs!

    1. Show previous comments  5 more
    2. MarcoJ

      MarcoJ

      so in other words, you find their meat fill ratios to be sub-par.

    3. dudeguy

      dudeguy

      where's the beef??

    4. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      As a vegetarian I agree with you.  Didn't expect that huh?

  22. What do you do when you've had too many beers?   Have too many more!

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Atarian7

      Atarian7

      One time I had 16 beers.  I didn't get a hangover or feel sick.  I did throw up the next morning, but I didn't feel bad before hand.  I just

      felt my stomach start to contract and knew I was going throw up.

    3. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      Myself I tend to have 1 or 2...That's getting older for ya.  Although sometimes there are special occasions,  watching the Venom Inc concert was like a party with many old friends,  and I had somewhere between 5 and 7, because people would buy me a drink, etc...Good Times!!

    4. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      One of my coworkers just got back from a vacation where all his (high school or college) friends take a trip each year and meet up at a cabin by a lake in Georgia...He said he broke the record,  drinking 29 beers in 22 hours...(Damn!  My stomach hurts just thinking about it).

  23. The Internet:  It's only as fast as the slowest connection!

  24. Tuesday is really a Monday with a hangover!

  25. I don't know about you, but I love green onions on my tacos!

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. GoldLeader

      GoldLeader

      They're good!  Mine rhyme.  So,  I call them rap-scallions!

       

       

    3. SoundGammon

      SoundGammon

      I thought they we're named after a famous rock-n-roll instrumental!

    4. bent_pin

      bent_pin

      I have them growing in several places. I put them in a lot of stuff. If I have extra I'll make savory onion butter. 

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