ilmenit Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 (edited) Hi, I need a help of native English speaker who could fix/improve texts in my new game (fantasy themed). If you are willing to help, write me a PM or sign here and I will contact you. It would be great if you could add some Old English/Early Modern English style Edited September 7, 2009 by ilmenit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mimo Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I don't mind having a go:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilmenit Posted September 7, 2009 Author Share Posted September 7, 2009 I don't mind having a go:) Great. Let's wait for at least one more person. I think cooperation and brainstorm could give good results Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dwhyte Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Thou desirest some aide? My abilities are thine, good sir... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeteD Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I can help too but I can't guarantee I'll have a lot of time. Pete Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilmenit Posted September 7, 2009 Author Share Posted September 7, 2009 Thanks Check your inboxes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilmenit Posted September 8, 2009 Author Share Posted September 8, 2009 Guys, did you get my PM? I had no answer from anyone. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeteD Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 Sorry, yes, got it Like I say I won't have much time but I'll take a look through. How old English do you want it? I think doing too much will just confuse people. If there are certain characters it would suit (not checked if there is dialogue) then maybe best to limit it to them. Pete Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mimo Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 received, will try and get some time on it later tonight Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+orpheuswaking Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Late to the party... But if you need anyone else to take a look I'm willing to do so Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilmenit Posted October 30, 2009 Author Share Posted October 30, 2009 I bump this thread, because nobody did anything. The help of Native speaker is still needed! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackpanther Posted October 30, 2009 Share Posted October 30, 2009 I bump this thread, because nobody did anything. The help of Native speaker is still needed! I can help out if you want? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwobby Posted October 30, 2009 Share Posted October 30, 2009 I bump this thread, because nobody did anything. The help of Native speaker is still needed! I am happy to help you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christopher T Leach Posted October 30, 2009 Share Posted October 30, 2009 Pm me my old english could use some practice....see what I can do for ya' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mimo Posted October 30, 2009 Share Posted October 30, 2009 sorry, I have had no time at all recently. Best to let someone else do it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilmenit Posted November 2, 2009 Author Share Posted November 2, 2009 One good soul has changed the intro text to the "older" form: "The world hath ne’er been a reticent place. However, thy Dark Army that arrived one disastrous decade ago art turning everything into chaos. The eternity of terror and sorrow became a reality for everyone. The virtue king of the land hath been executed and his son hath been banished to prison for eternal abasement. After many years thee lose consciousness of not only how to be a prince, but also thy scent of thy trees and thy flowers, the torridity of thy sun and thy caress of thy gentle breeze. All hope hath been relinquished. Forever?" As I'm not an native English speaker it's hard for me to evaluate it. What to you think about it? Would you like to see the rest of texts in the game with such kind of language? Is it readable? regards, Jakub Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nonner242 Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 One good soul has changed the intro text to the "older" form: "The world hath ne'er been a reticent place. However, thy Dark Army that arrived one disastrous decade ago art turning everything into chaos. The eternity of terror and sorrow became a reality for everyone. The virtue king of the land hath been executed and his son hath been banished to prison for eternal abasement. After many years thee lose consciousness of not only how to be a prince, but also thy scent of thy trees and thy flowers, the torridity of thy sun and thy caress of thy gentle breeze. All hope hath been relinquished. Forever?" As I'm not an native English speaker it's hard for me to evaluate it. What to you think about it? Would you like to see the rest of texts in the game with such kind of language? Is it readable? regards, Jakub Needs a little fine tuning. I think it abit too much. "The world hath never been a silent lusterless place. However, thy Dark Army that arrived one disastrous decade ago swiftly turning everything into chaos. The eternity of dread and affliction became a certainty for one and all. The valiant king of the our land hath been executed and his son hath been banished to prison for eternal disgrace. After many years thou hast cloudy consciousness of not only how to be a prince, but also thy scent of thy trees and thy flowers, the torridity of thy sun and thy caress of thy gentle breeze. All hope hath been relinquished. forever and a day?" Just seems to flow abit smoother...and not overly Archaic . This is just my opinion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn Jefferson Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 (edited) I think too much of ye Olde English tends to make it seem forced... I would do away with some or all of it. Maybe only using some of it in dialogue within your game. Adding to confusion, here's my stab at the opening (leaving some of the old-type english): "The world hath never been a safe and silent place, however its perils were familiar and well known. The Dark Army that descended upon the land one disastrous decade ago brought with it chaos and pain, and made of these simple worries only a memory. An eternity of dread and affliction became a certainty for the high-born and peasant alike. The virtuous king of the land hath been executed and his son left to rot in a prison cell. Memories of his life as the Prince of the land have faded away like mist, and only half-remembered visions, clutched tightly to his breast, of the sun upon an open field, or the smile on a maiden's face armor his soul from complete madness. It seemed that all hope had been relinquished..." Hehe, I guess I took some poetic license with it. Edited November 3, 2009 by Shawn Jefferson Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwobby Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 I think too much of ye Olde English tends to make it seem forced... I would do away with some or all of it. Maybe only using some of it in dialogue within your game. Adding to confusion, here's my stab at the opening (leaving some of the old-type english): "The world hath never been a safe and silent place, however its perils were familiar and well known. The Dark Army that descended upon the land one disastrous decade ago brought with it chaos and pain, and made of these simple worries only a memory. An eternity of dread and affliction became a certainty for the high-born and peasant alike. The virtuous king of the land hath been executed and his son left to rot in a prison cell. Memories of his life as the Prince of the land have faded away like mist, and only half-remembered visions, clutched tightly to his breast, of the sun upon an open field, or the smile on a maiden's face armor his soul from complete madness. It seemed that all hope had been relinquished..." Hehe, I guess I took some poetic license with it. Wow... that's good! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ilmenit Posted November 3, 2009 Author Share Posted November 3, 2009 Shawn, I like it too :-) Would you like to help with some other texts from my game? There are not many of them - a few kilobytes of plain text. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn Jefferson Posted November 5, 2009 Share Posted November 5, 2009 Sure, I can try to help out, unless someone's already doing it? Maybe someone else can "Olde English" it up after if that's what you are looking for? PM me the details if you like.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shawn Jefferson Posted November 10, 2009 Share Posted November 10, 2009 ilmenit, you've got PM. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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