Shameful Gamer Confessions

[MagitekAngel]

Inspired by a similar thread on /v/ that got pretty funny.

 

I'll start with a bunch.

 

-I played Barbie Super Model on the SNES for more than ten minutes.

-I was afraid to enter boss doors in Zelda: A Link to the Past until I was about 8-9.

-I collect RPGs, but can count the number I've actually beaten on one hand.

-I was outraged during the Infinity Ward/Activision fiasco but can't remember who I was angry at, and also temporarily forgot at the time that I never have and never will touch a Call of Duty game regardless of who makes it.

-I have owned and extensively played four (4) separate Dragon Ball Z fighting games.

-I dimly recall having a crush on Malon from Zelda Ocarina of Time when I was 10

-Ditto Marin from Link's Awakening (All 30 or so pixels of her)

Edited September 28, 2011 by MagitekAngel

[A_Locomotive]

- I had had a crush on adult ruto from Ocarina of Time when I was 12, there was just something about fish boobs...

- I buy more games(and consoles) then I play, more then a few of the games I own I've only put a few hours on and in more then a few cases haven't even played them yet despite owning them for sometimes years.

- When I was in middle school and playing the the first pokemon game, I named my Metapod penis, never let it evolve and started off every 2 player battle with it using harden.

- I have never beaten a final fantasy game despite having played a lot of them and in many cases having put an unholy amount of hours into them, when I invariably come back to them I've forgotten all the tactics and have to start over.

- I was addicted to the facebook crack that farmville is, I realized I had a problem when I was setting my alarm to 3am to harvest my crops, I haven't played a facebook game since.

- I've never beaten the original StarCraft or its expansion without cheats.

- I've destroyed more then $100 worth of PS1 and PS2 controllers out of anger, I had one hell of a temper growing up.

Edited September 28, 2011 by A_Locomotive

[Dr Manhattan]

I bought Panzer Dragoon Saga and waited two years before I played it. (..one of the best RPGs I've ever played in my entire life.)

 

For several years I masqueraded as the retail buyer for a certain "music and more" retail chain, just so I could go to e3. I went so often people at the company starting thinking I really worked there. They would get mail, occasional phone calls, etc. (I went seven years in a row this way. Later I got a real job and now I masquerade as a gonzo journalist.)

 

In the 90s I drove around with a 19" color TV on the back seat of my 84' Toyota. It was covered with a blanket. In the trunk was a 2600 in a paper bag, along with some games, an extension cord and all sorts of hook ups and controllers. I was always ready for retro gaming. (Come to think of it, that last one isn't shameful at all, more like a badge of honor.)

Edited September 28, 2011 by Dr Manhattan

[Reaperman]

<ul>

<li>I own systems *with* games that I've never played or even tested.</li>

<li>*Frequently* when I purchase titles new, I have no intention of ever opening the package.</li>

<li>I've never beaten a Super Mario title, despite having bought the NES to play SMB1. (I swear everybody's lying about beating it)</li>

<li>I've also never beaten a Final Fantasy game, but I'm willing to sink 70+ hours into one.</li>

<li>I really enjoyed Big Mutha Truckers on GBA, and have beaten it.</li>

<li>I like slow-moving games over action titles. Economic simulators are my favorites.</li>

<li>Outside of the A8 computers, I tend not to enjoy Atari hardware.</li>

</ul>

 

[MagitekAngel]

Ooh, I've got a good one!

 

-I originally joined AtariAge in 2009 because I had just gotten my first ever 2600 in the mail off of eBay, and I couldn't figure out how to hook the damn thing up.

[Tempest]

I bought Panzer Dragoon Saga and waited two years before I played it. (..one of the best RPGs I've ever played in my entire life.)

I bought Panzer Dragoon Saga about 5 years ago and still have never played it. It's on my list though.

 

Tempest

[Hatta]

I bought Panzer Dragoon Saga and waited two years before I played it. (..one of the best RPGs I've ever played in my entire life.)

I bought Panzer Dragoon Saga about 5 years ago and still have never played it. It's on my list though.

 

Tempest

 

I'm playing through PDS right now. I guess my gamer confession is that I don't like it all that much. I'm almost at the end so I have a pretty good idea of what the game is all about. It's just linear, very cutscene heavy, and the combat system is so dumbed down it's pointless. I've changed my dragon type twice I think, and changed it right back to normal.

 

It's not a bad game though, and certainly ahead of its time. It's a pleasant enough way to spend some time, but it doesn't live up to its legendary status, IMO. Feel free to shun me know.

[SoulBlazer]

Let's see --

 

-- there are numerous games I never could beat in the day that I have finally won thanks to emulation ands ave states

-- I listen to game music in the car and at work

-- I enjoy playing horse racing and simulation games

-- I've gone looking for pics of hot video game girls

 

I think that's enough shaming myself for one day.

[HatefulGravey]

• I keep buying PS2 stuff and have no PS2
  
• I beat the Barney game for the Genesis
  
• I played Strawberry Shortcake for the VCS for 20 min before I understood it was just a dress-up game, then I played for another 10 min
  
• I'm truely addicted to collecting. Its more then a hobby, I swear I'm addicted. I buy things just because I don't have them
  
• I watch "lets play" videos and console reviews on YouTube all day at work every day. I have seen many many many of them and will watch the same one twice if I can't find something new.
  

[keilbaca]

- When I was in middle school and playing the the first pokemon game, I named my Metapod penis, never let it evolve and started off every 2 player battle with it using harden.

 

I nearly pissed myself laughing, that's amazing.

 

Here is some of mine:

 

-I have pirated games, bought the game due to liking it so much, then never played it again.

-Until a couple years ago, I have never beaten the first Super Mario Bros. This is after getting to World 8-3 in 6 minutes, still never did beat it till later.

-In the military, I would have entire paychecks spent before I got them in the mail, on collecting games.

-I got thrown off of the DDR pads at Tokyo Game Show after one song. I guess they didn't like american's playing 9 foot songs.

-I also have gone looking for pics of hot video game girls.

-I bought and actually enjoyed Napoleon Dynamite for the DS.

 

That's all for now

[HatefulGravey]

• My wife, who has no interest in classic gaming, knows many of you by screen name. I think I talk too much about this place.
  
• I feel like I'm saving a game from a certain destruction when I buy it from a flea market, pawn shop, or thirft store.
  
• i really want to build a "gaming throne" out of Pac-Man and ET VCS carts.
  
• GameFly pisses me off because they use the image on and Atari controller as their logo and carry no classic games at all. They even have a guy talk about how much he loves the classics on the commercials... THEY HAVE NO CLASSICS!
  

[Tempest]

I touch myself to pictures of Yoshi.

 

Actually the only real confession I have is that I've grown lazy over the years and always use a walkthrough for RPGs so I do miss anything. These days I don't have time to comb over every square inch of the world to find all the hidden stuff or replay a game several times to see the 'good ending'. Oddly using a walkthrough doesn't diminish my enjoyment of the game even though my wife says it's cheating.

 

 

• My wife, who has no interest in classic gaming, knows many of you by screen name. I think I talk too much about this place.
  

Ditto.

[TwinChargers]

I spend significantly more time with the hobby of collecting and researching than I do actually playing games. Significantly.

[HatefulGravey]

I spend significantly more time with the hobby of collecting and researching than I do actually playing games. Significantly.

 

Agreed! Oh, and how about this one:

• I spend more on games then I do my power bill most months.
  

[Tempest]

I spend significantly more time with the hobby of collecting and researching than I do actually playing games. Significantly.

I have a similar problem. I spend more time moving/hooking up game systems in a quest for the ultimate game room than I do actually playing the games. I think I enjoy it more too. Weird.

 

Tempest

[keilbaca]

I spend significantly more time with the hobby of collecting and researching than I do actually playing games. Significantly.

I have a similar problem. I spend more time moving/hooking up game systems in a quest for the ultimate game room than I do actually playing the games. I think I enjoy it more too. Weird.

 

Tempest

 

Ah yes, I am exactly the same way. I had more fun building my SuperGun, building arcade cabinets and joysticks for various consoles, and refurbishing a pinball machine, significantly more than actually playing them. My MAME cab got touched maybe twice a year after I built it, and those were when I had guitar hero parties.

[Animan]

-I play and regularly enjoy Sonic 3D Blast and Sonic R.

-I used to own Deal or No Deal for the DS, and liked it (same goes for the DVD game version).

-I lost to Glass Joe the first time playing Mike Tyson's Punchout.

-I play Solstice on the NES just to listen to the music.

-I used to label the edges of my N64 games with Sharpie (I use a label maker for that, now).

-I once tried the Konami Code in Mega Man 2, convinced that it would work somehow.

-I played Q*Bert on my GP2X Wiz to try and impress a girl.

 

That's all I can think of at the moment...

[Sonic R]

•I used to record and listen to video game music

•I have the sound test codes memorized to this day for many games (Guardian Legend, Ninja Gaiden, Military Madness, Blazing Lazers)

•in a game that has a female character selectable, I ALWAYS will pick her to play the game through

•I buy, collect, and use strategy guides for RPGs - and I still enjoy the games

•I was excited for and promptly downloaded all the Duran Duran songs in Rock Band (John Taylor is the most underrated bass player in the world IMHO)

 

[BydoEmpire]

Never owned or played Super Mario Brothers 3. Big fan of the 2d Mario games, but when 3 came out I was playing a lot of SMS and got a Genny shortly thereafter.

[HuckleCat]

Oh wow. Hrmmm.

 

- When I was 9, this was back in 1984, I snuck into the local high school computer lab and stole a bulk package of 5 1/4 blank disks, and several crappy candy bars that were for the band to sell.

- As a teen, I shoplifted the cluebooks for Bards Tale 3 and Dragon Wars, and also the game Techno Cop for the Apple 2.

- When I was 14 my best friends sister sat in my lap and we groped each other while looking at sex cartoons on my apple //c.

- I spend way too much time collecting disk images and roms to games I will never, ever play.

- I met my wife on Craigslist. For out first date I took her back to my place and we played Wii and got stoned, then I ate her out. She was 18, I was 34.

- I sold an Amiga 500 back in 97' for 75 bucks. I spent it on pot.

 

That's all for now. I mean, I got more. Way more. But, yah, I'm gonna stop there.

[AlvinKarpis]

-I lost to Glass Joe the first time playing Mike Tyson's Punchout.

 

lmao!

 

My 7 year old daughter just played MTPO for the first time a couple weeks ago and lost to Glass Joe

 

I told her that I have never seen anybody lose to Glass Joe and she got mad

 

Now I can tell her that shes not alone

[Animan]

- When I was 14 my best friends sister sat in my lap and we groped each other while looking at sex cartoons on my apple //c.

 

I couldn't help but LOL at that one.

[Wntermute]

- Out of the first 4 Super Mario console games, I've only beaten 2 and World.

- I've never beaten NES Metroid (same battle in Super Metroid and Metroid Zero Mission, I can beat), always die fighting Mother Brain because of those stupid flying cheerios

- I feel Vanish + X-Zone/Doom on Final Fantasy III/6 is a legitimate strategy

- I feel that playing kids games and/or movie license games for easy gamerscore/trophies is a legitimate strategy (Simpsons Game: Press Start = achievement.. it's that easy)

[Animan]

I don't like Street Fighter that much. There, I said it.

 

*goes back to playing Fighters Megamix*

[Rockin' Kat]

I've never been able to get through the last world of SMB3 on Nintendo. In fact I've never actually got to the ending of a single side-scrolling platformer. The only 8-bit game with an end that I've actually reached end of is Rampage for the Sega Master System.

 

I screwed up an s-video and Stereo Audio-output-through-expantion-port mod in my model 1 Genesis while adding something else and I couldn't fix it because I can't tell what wire goes where.(I've already got arrangements on this issue)

 

I've wasted good money and time trying to get a good nice condition boxed copy of Rockin' Kats that actually has the poster. I given up. The stupid game is impossible to get in nice condition for anything under too much and sellers always manage to hide bad-condition of boxes by taking crappy pictures. It's not worth the trouble.