Ouch!

[Shephda]

This dad is serious, or at least a good selling ploy:

http://dayton.craigslist.org/ele/2596660283.html

[Emehr]

I wouldn't necessarily call that punishment...

 

[SlowCoder]

Some parents ...

 

If that PSP was YOURS (you got it as a gift, or bought it yourself), and not your father's, I don't think he has the moral right to sell it. If he does sell it, then the money is yours. He can confiscate it for a while.

 

But if it is his, and you just play it, well, that's different.

[The Usotsuki]

Some parents consider all their kids' stuff theirs anyway. My family did.

[MagitekAngel]

I dunno guys. Around here I've noticed that some (not all) kids are becoming real assholes lately, and having been a kid myself not all that long ago, I can't figure out why. Maybe this kid got what was coming to him, and will smarten up.

[Gabriel]

That kid had horrible taste in games. They're all shit titles that clog bargain bins. Dad's asking too much for the package. I could definitely get a brand new PSP with all the titles listed for under what he's asking. For a used PSP (unknown model) and those games, the package is worth maybe $100 tops. And I'm a big PSP fan who thinks it's a fantastic system, and easily better than any other portable.

[SlowCoder]

Some parents consider all their kids' stuff theirs anyway. My family did.

They would imply that children are property. They are not, as to me that is no different than the wife being property of the husband.. But they are under guidance of parents until an appropriate age, when they are allowed to make their own way as an adult.

 

As they are not property of parents, neither are the things that they own, that were gifted to them, or that they obtained by by their own means.

[The Usotsuki]

Guess it goes hand in hand with fundamentalist Christianity, to which my family *did* subscribe. >_>

[Metal Ghost]

Some parents consider all their kids' stuff theirs anyway. My family did.

They would imply that children are property. They are not, as to me that is no different than the wife being property of the husband.. But they are under guidance of parents until an appropriate age, when they are allowed to make their own way as an adult.

 

As they are not property of parents, neither are the things that they own, that were gifted to them, or that they obtained by by their own means.

 

My job, as a parent, is to look out for the well being of my children. That includes ensuring that they get a good education. This kid is obviously not going to get that good education if he keeps getting suspended from school. Odds are that the PSP came from his parents, but even if it did not, they have EVERY right to sell it if it's getting in the way of the kid's schooling. Doing so makes no implications, in my opinion at least, that the child themselves are considered property. Period.

 

I mean hell, I don't consider my daughter's Zoobles and Squinkies mine , but if they posed some kind of issue for her (whether that be a 'hard' issue like choking hazzard, or 'soft' issue like being so distractive that she didn't get her school work done) then yes, it's my 'right' as a parent to rectify the situation.

 

I think that actually selling the PSP is a bit harsh as an initial punishment, as opposed to just taking it away. But we don't know the specifics either. What were they suspended for? Was it their 1st or 3rd suspension? If more parents took a more active roll in actually parenting, we'd have less little punks running around.

[SlowCoder]

I've got no problem with a parent removing something from their child's possession if it is causing problems. None at all. That is logical and good parenting, and I am totally in agreement.

 

I guess I see it this way:

If my kid is 16 years old, and has purchased a car by saving from a job, OR, money has been gifted to them to purchase the car, the vehicle is theirs. I would not take ownership of the vehicle from him to sell. BUT, if there was trouble, I would revoke his privilege to drive it, take his license, keys, disable the car in some hidden way, etc. When he straightens up, or turns 18, he gets the privilege to drive again.

 

In this way, he's still the owner, but I as the parent have restricted his ability to drive it.

 

In contrast, if the car was not actually his ... It's actually a family car that has been "loaned" to him, then I have every right as the parent/owner of it to get rid of it however I feel.

 

If I owned something and my parents sold it or gave it away as a form of punishment, I would have been very upset to the point of complete noncompliance, whereas if I didn't own it, it would have been more of a "it was nice while I had it" thing.

 

I hope this kind of helps you understand my point.

[Metal Ghost]

I've got no problem with a parent removing something from their child's possession if it is causing problems. None at all. That is logical and good parenting, and I am totally in agreement.

 

I guess I see it this way:

If my kid is 16 years old, and has purchased a car by saving from a job, OR, money has been gifted to them to purchase the car, the vehicle is theirs. I would not take ownership of the vehicle from him to sell. BUT, if there was trouble, I would revoke his privilege to drive it, take his license, keys, disable the car in some hidden way, etc. When he straightens up, or turns 18, he gets the privilege to drive again.

 

In this way, he's still the owner, but I as the parent have restricted his ability to drive it.

 

In contrast, if the car was not actually his ... It's actually a family car that has been "loaned" to him, then I have every right as the parent/owner of it to get rid of it however I feel.

 

If I owned something and my parents sold it or gave it away as a form of punishment, I would have been very upset to the point of complete noncompliance, whereas if I didn't own it, it would have been more of a "it was nice while I had it" thing.

 

I hope this kind of helps you understand my point.

 

Yea, I'm pickin' up what you're spillin' and would basically agree.

[Shephda]

Some parents consider all their kids' stuff theirs anyway. My family did.

They would imply that children are property. They are not, as to me that is no different than the wife being property of the husband.. But they are under guidance of parents until an appropriate age, when they are allowed to make their own way as an adult. As they are not property of parents, neither are the things that they own, that were gifted to them, or that they obtained by by their own means.

 

As I reminded my three children, until that magic 18th birthday i own that ass and all property associated with it!

Parents who raise kids as their friends or equals are hurting the kids and society. They grow up to politicians or worse, join groups like OWS.

[Lendorien]

Frankly, I agree with others. As longs as I am my kid's legal guardian, I have the responsibility of taking care of them, physically, emotionally and mentally. I'd have to know the situation, to make a complete judgement, but I do not have a problem with parents taking things away from kids if the children behave irresponsibly.

 

I remember when I was a kid, I once left the freezer door open after being told to make sure it was closed when I went into it. We lost almost 80 dollars worth of food due to my mistake. As a 7 year old, I did not fully understand the consequences of my actions, until my dad took away the money from my piggy bank. Losing that money that I'd saved from grandparent gifts and from finding on the road really brought home to me that the food in the freezer had value, just like the money (what little there was) in my piggy bank had value. I was VERY careful about the freezer ever after. Still am.

 

Parents have to make these decisions for the good of their children. Sadly, a lot of parents are somehow afraid to set ground rules, have standards or keep their children accountable. They're afraid of being mean, not realizing that all their worrying about "being mean" is to the detriment of their kid who they are ending up raising as a spoiled brat.

 

My late aunt worked as a teacher for 25 years in special ed. She did the same age level the entire time. From 1985 when she started to last year when I last talked to her about it, she said that the amount of serious behavioral problems kids coming to her class had went from about none a year to half the class. Why is this? It's the dissolving of any sort of parenting skills.

 

I laud the father for doing this. Hopefully he's getting through to his kid.

Edited October 13, 2011 by Lendorien

[SlowCoder]

Different styles of parenting ... makes the world go 'round.

 

Don't get me wrong. I exact discipline when needed, just like the rest of you. My argument is about property and rights.

 

Based on my understanding of what some of you have typed, you consider your children's property your property, by the mere fact that that child is under your guidance and care. I maintain that if the child worked hard to earn whatever it was (car, Gameboy, whatever), then it is theirs. As parents don't you think we should build our children's concept of right to ownership?

 

My son owns a DSi that he bought with his own money. I don't dictate to him where he can take it, as long as it's not inappropriate to have it there. If he breaks it, his loss, and lesson learned. I will remove his DSi from his possession for punishment, but it remains his, and he knows he will eventually get it back, and he has concept of ownership that it is his. I ask him if I may borrow it if I want to play it, because I respect him and his right to ownership.

 

I own a PSP that he uses regularly. He plays it when he wants, but I make sure he takes care of it when he does, and it doesn't get left in the hot car, or get shared with his friends. The PSP may disappear one day, never to be seen by him again, at my discretion.

[Shephda]

Different styles of parenting ... makes the world go 'round. Don't get me wrong. I exact discipline when needed, just like the rest of you. My argument is about property and rights. Based on my understanding of what some of you have typed, you consider your children's property your property, by the mere fact that that child is under your guidance and care. I maintain that if the child worked hard to earn whatever it was (car, Gameboy, whatever), then it is theirs. As parents don't you think we should build our children's concept of right to ownership? My son owns a DSi that he bought with his own money. I don't dictate to him where he can take it, as long as it's not inappropriate to have it there. If he breaks it, his loss, and lesson learned. I will remove his DSi from his possession for punishment, but it remains his, and he knows he will eventually get it back, and he has concept of ownership that it is his. I ask him if I may borrow it if I want to play it, because I respect him and his right to ownership. I own a PSP that he uses regularly. He plays it when he wants, but I make sure he takes care of it when he does, and it doesn't get left in the hot car, or get shared with his friends. The PSP may disappear one day, never to be seen by him again, at my discretion.

 

And that shows that you are a good parent. You are instilling values into your child that will make his behavior such that you will never have to resort to such drastic discipline. In some cases it's necessary to be firmer with a child.

 

The worst I ever had to do was one time my eldest daughter (around 12 years old at the time) absolutely refused to clean her room. I'm not talking simple picking up a pair of socks and making her bed, I mean her room was a MESS. I told her one last time either she cleans it up or I do and it all goes in the trash. After filling three bags with her cloths and misc stuff, she finally broke and saw I was not kidding. Never had that problem again.

She's 24 now and when we laugh about that sh still gives me THAT look. She's now an RN and a wonderful young woman.