Tr3vor Posted February 27, 2013 Share Posted February 27, 2013 Trevor Belmont is after me then... I'll just hire Medusa heads to attack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+atari2600land Posted February 27, 2013 Share Posted February 27, 2013 I just played Frogger, so I guess that means a frog is after me. Better than say Pole Position where I'd get run over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chuck D. Head Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 The Jeep from Jackal is firing at me. I should be ok if I stay below him on the screen and avoid 90 and 45% angles from him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AtariLeaf Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 (edited) Dr. J and Larry Bird - I was playing XE One on One Basketball. I guess I'd throw a baskeball at their heads or perhaps break the glass on a wicked slamdunk and cut them to shreds with the falling glass? Edited February 28, 2013 by AtariLeaf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desiv Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 (edited) Well, he can jump much better than I can, and he's pretty fast... Of course, he's a mouse... So I shouldn't be too worried.. Then again, judging by his size next to the furniture and pictures he collects, he's 3-4 feet tall?? A 3-4 foot tall mouse who is quick and can jump and is bent on my destruction? Mappy takes me down pretty quickly... ;-( desiv Edited March 1, 2013 by desiv 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turntablist1210 Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 The whole US Army from battlefield 2, but if that aint retro enuf then i guess Jet Set Willy is after me, eh im not fussed lazy fucker! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chuckwalla Posted March 3, 2013 Share Posted March 3, 2013 Some great responses here. Let's see. I recently discovered Bubba N Stix for the Genesis so if Bubba was after me and wanted to use Stix to cause me bodily harm (winces in pain), i'd blow him away with my Remington 12ga HD shotgun (00 buckshot should take him out). Then i'd take Stix from his carcass and sell him to the highest bidder on ebay and use the proceeds to finance one of those MAME arcade machines with roller controller, double joystick for Robotron and Space Dungeon, souped up sound system with extra subwoofers, and a 20" monitor. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taskmaster99 Posted March 3, 2013 Share Posted March 3, 2013 Great. I'm gonna get my ass kicked by freakin Bentley Bear. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retrorussell Posted March 3, 2013 Share Posted March 3, 2013 I'd be in pretty big trouble.. I recently played MAYDAY (Hoei, 1981); the main character is a ship. All they'd have to do is shoot me. I'd have to dodge and weave to get out of their line of fire as I run, trying to contact the army or something and hope they can take it down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadow460 Posted March 3, 2013 Share Posted March 3, 2013 (edited) Hmm, if the main character in the last retro game I played wants me dead, I can do several things: 1. Summon a ghost so he will be too scared to move. 2. Blast him with a garden hose, which is super effective. 3. Throw rocks at him, which would also be super effective. 4. Leave him in daycare so he levels up. The game is Pokemon Red, and it's main character is the fire Pokemon, Charizard. Edited March 3, 2013 by shadow460 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoon Posted March 3, 2013 Share Posted March 3, 2013 Ha! Great idea for a thread. I suppose I would escape Pac-Man by disguising myself as a box of laxatives. When it comes to chomping the undead, Packy is the man. He has the stomach to mow peaches with the pit, bells, keys, and even Galbosses. The dude is a complete and total badass when it comes to putting entirely inappropriate shit in his mouth, but he's not so tough as to swallow a 200 lbs laxative. But let's just say he is. Let's say I've done something so friggen horrible that he HAS to kill me. I backed over Chomp-Chomp, I was a decision-making executive at General Computer Corporation, I have a tattoo on my chest of a heart with the name Tod Frye in it and an arrow going through it. Just something really despicable where Pac-Man might just say, "Projectile shitting for a couple days is totally worth it". In that case, I'd dress up as Paris Hilton. Because even if violent forceful diarrhea isn't a deterrent, explaining to your wife why your breath smells like a diseased whore should be. Check and mate, Pac-Man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taskmaster99 Posted March 9, 2013 Share Posted March 9, 2013 just played a little "Punisher" on the Genesis. I stand no chance. Goodbye cruel world. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retrorussell Posted March 10, 2013 Share Posted March 10, 2013 Just played DOUBLE DRIBBLE. So a basketball player is after me. Not terribly threatening IMHO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Austin Posted March 10, 2013 Share Posted March 10, 2013 I just run and laugh because Link's magic sword or whatever doesn't go all the way across the screen and can never reach me (Zelda II). 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DestinedCruz Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 just played a little "Punisher" on the Genesis. I stand no chance. Goodbye cruel world. If you actually own that then I am SUPER JEALOUS. That port is nothing short of outstanding. Anyway on topic I would be absolutely screwed. Dragon Force for the Saturn has 8 main characters and they're all monarchs with massive armies. I'd have the entire continent of Legandra trying to kill me with untold amounts of steel and magic. No bueno. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retrorussell Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 Prince Colwyn from KRULL. If I can just avoid his flying glaive he himself seems like a bit of a wuss. Maybe I could kick some boulders down a hill at him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taskmaster99 Posted March 11, 2013 Share Posted March 11, 2013 If you actually own that then I am SUPER JEALOUS. That port is nothing short of outstanding. Anyway on topic I would be absolutely screwed. Dragon Force for the Saturn has 8 main characters and they're all monarchs with massive armies. I'd have the entire continent of Legandra trying to kill me with untold amounts of steel and magic. No bueno. Yes i do own it. CIB. I am equally jealous of your Dragon Force. Have not been able to get my hands on that game for quite awhile!!!!! Everytime I find it...it is usually way outta my price range. Just hit up a little 10 yard fight. Now mind you there are more of them than me......but they move so damn slow....I think I can just walk away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toptenmaterial Posted March 12, 2013 Share Posted March 12, 2013 Damn, Mario and Luigi are gonna run a train on my ass. Bowser Jr will be there for comical reasons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NE146 Posted March 13, 2013 Share Posted March 13, 2013 I just run and laugh because Link's magic sword or whatever doesn't go all the way across the screen and can never reach me (Zelda II). Never? What about with the Fire Spell equipped? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retrorussell Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 Spider-Man: The Arcade Game (Sega, 1991). I wouldn't like my chances going up against ol' web-head. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamesD Posted March 15, 2013 Share Posted March 15, 2013 What if the last retro game you played was pong or breakout? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Segataritensoftii Posted March 16, 2013 Author Share Posted March 16, 2013 What if the last retro game you played was pong or breakout? You could probably dodge the paddle since it can only move in one direction, but the ball might be tricky. Then again, you might be safe if you live out on a huge prairie or desert. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taskmaster99 Posted March 17, 2013 Share Posted March 17, 2013 Just played a little "Mach Rider". I cannot ride a motorcycle......a motorcycle goes much faster than my truck....plus it has guns. All I can hope for is to hit the brakes and maybe he will slam into my ass end. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Serious Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 Adam Power on his rocket sled. Crap, I don't know what to do. Call the police? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamesD Posted March 18, 2013 Share Posted March 18, 2013 Hmmm... is Tomb Raider old enough? Cause if Laura Croft is after me I think I'll let her catch me... but then you added that whole trying to kill me thing and had to spoil it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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