Jump to content
IGNORED

My daughter has left Hospital...


Mclaneinc

Recommended Posts

 

Totally hear you on the mental aspect of what must have been a most horrendous period for you.

We had the Hospital phoning us this afternoon, begging us to come down (it's a 90 min journey by car) as they cannot do a thing with my father.Physically he's healing well after an operation and the treatment for various complications, but mentally, he's just withdrawn into himself and refuses to eat, allow nurses anywhere near him, won't talk and it takes 3 of them just to lift him out of bed as he practically fights them to stay in...
Just come out of nowhere.The physical complications we expected given his age, past health issues, but the mental illness...just floored us....as we've no idea how to deal with it.

 

PM Sent.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Totally hear you on the mental aspect of what must have been a most horrendous period for you.

We had the Hospital phoning us this afternoon, begging us to come down (it's a 90 min journey by car) as they cannot do a thing with my father.Physically he's healing well after an operation and the treatment for various complications, but mentally, he's just withdrawn into himself and refuses to eat, allow nurses anywhere near him, won't talk and it takes 3 of them just to lift him out of bed as he practically fights them to stay in...
Just come out of nowhere.The physical complications we expected given his age, past health issues, but the mental illness...just floored us....as we've no idea how to deal with it.

 

 

 

My friend I totally understand, its a massive nightmare and there's no way to pretend it will suddenly get better, as you have found its often the mental health issues that cause the most hurt, I know when my mother died in 2001 after many years of show signs of mental health problems she succumbed to Dementia and I'd never wish that on ANYONE, the things you encounter on that path are simply too painful to write...

 

BUT you must do what you can or you will hate yourself later, I tried my best, I really did but it was simply awful,.

 

You HAVE to understand that its not them, its the illness, my mother who I'd looked after all those years forgot I was her son and thought I was her ex husband, the things she said to me will haunt me forever but I know it was the illness speaking and not them, my mother was a small sweet lady with amazing hand writing, and a sweetness that was beyond lovely, remember that person, never base what you saw during illness....

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

You have all been so kind and some of the other comments humble me with their niceness as well as sadly hearing how some of you guys are coping with similar situations, I wish I could wipe it away for ALL of us, sadly money and my inability to be a god mean I can't but you are in my wishes, not much comfort but maybe one day a positive nature WILL affect our outcomes.

 

My next project is to get the PS4 I promised her when she went in to Huntercombe, between all the travelling its been impossible to make it happen as I'm myself to ill to work BUT now she's out I'll be able to start getting there. But before that I want her constantly well and happy, its been traumatic for her, in some ways she feels she has lost her 'back up team' now she is out of hospital but I swear we will step in with the new outside team and I'll make sure it works..

 

Things MUST move up from here... :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This is probably crazy, me just updating total strangers, but it helps with my head...

For those of you not in UK, but here 'stories' about our NHS..this is as good as an example as you'll get.
Phone went at 23.30, Hospital my Father is currently in, long story short, night shift Doctor had come on, altered to fact my Father has taken a turn for the worse and would i mind detailing his full medical history as well as events leading to him initally being transfered to North devon District Hospital and now Plymouth as she did'nt have his case notes and had no idea what he was in for, let alone what she should be looking for.
Oh and he's picked up infection number 4 since being admitted to Hospital, but no, they did'nt know what it was......
Think my head is going to implode at this rate.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can only echo what Mclaneinc has said as he, Stephen, hell so many of you good folk have been simply wonderful on here.You make the difference, trust me.

I know my posts etc often wind folks up (not intentional) but at the moment i simply have to keep my mind active as over thinking the real world is just going to take it's toll, so i use the forum as a mental breathing space as it were.Somewhere i can just for a moment distance myself from what we have to face.
I think my Father has simply retreated into the darkest part of his mind, unwilling or unable to deal with what's happening and part of me honestly does'nt blame him.
Thanks yet again for everyones support and kindness.
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The fact that your father was being cared for by staff who had no idea what his situation is, I find grossly inexcusable. The last time my own father was in the hospital, he was in 3 days. He was medicated 3 times per day for a total of 9. Every time a nurse was about to put meds in his IV, he would ask her to tell him what she was giving him and how much. Three out of those nine times, the nurse was going to give him the incorrect dose. The med schedule which specifies the ordered meds and what doses, was right in his chart, which was right in his room. I'm pretty sure protocol dictates that the chart be checked before meds are administered, and yet, that was not done, resulting in what would have been a 33.33% error rate. That's pretty pathetic. But at least they did all know what he was in for.

Edited by fujidude
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

The fact that your father was being cared for by staff who had no idea what his situation is, I find grossly inexcusable. The last time my own father was in the hospital, he was in 3 days. He was medicated 3 times per day for a total of 9. Every time a nurse was about to put meds in his IV, he would ask her to tell him what she was giving him and how much. Three out of those nine times, the nurse was going to give him the incorrect dose. The med schedule which specifies the ordered meds and what doses, was right in his chart, which was right in his room. I'm pretty sure protocol dictates that the chart be checked before meds are administered, and yet, that was not done, resulting in what would have been a 33.33% error rate. That's pretty pathetic. But at least they did all know what he was in for.

Did you know that every year in North America the wrong meds or over medication given by doctors kills 1 million people. This has killed more people than WW2. Yet this is not a problem?

Good for you questioning the nurse. Too many times these medical people are treated like gods and our society is trained not to question these intelligent people.

Do you know what % of doctors wash there hands going from patient to patient? It is less than 50%. Also the trend of nurses waltzing around in thier scrubs after work getting groceries is gross. I would rather see a sheep farmer after cleaning the barn wearing his coveralls picking up a quart of milk. Ya think these basic cleanliness issues were discovered over 100 years ago..

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Going back to when my dad was last in intensive care a few years ago, my sister (a staff nurse herself! and my Brother In Law) had gotten there ahead of us to visit him, she read the medical chart which clearly said NO FLUIDS and then proceeded to give him a bottle of water....

 

We arrived, had to wait 90 mins whilst they stabilised him as a result of said water incident.

 

When Mother was in hospital, i sat and watched nurses walk down through the housing estate that lays next to the hospital, smoking, coughing etc, all in full uniform, go straight into hospital and i then met them again on very ward Mother was in.

 

High care ward? more like did'nt seem to care....

 

I've worked in the food industry for past 11 years, Asceptic stuff, very high care, strict hygiene rules, CCPs, everything done to prevent cross contamination etc etc, strict hand washing enforcement, you name it.

 

I visit UK Hospital wards, no-one ever seems to wash hands before entering, your free to stroll around as you wish etc etc.Shocking

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I know when Serena was in Ealing Hospital initially we stayed with her day and night, it was amazing how many staff were outside the hospital smoking at all times, none of us smoke and when someone has then its a VERY powerful smell, in the end I had to complain because Serena like most newly located anorexic's was as close to death as could be and wasn't allowed to walk ANYWHERE and was told to try not to cough etc as it could bring on a heart attack, the nurses stunk of smoke in some cases, thankfully it was sorted.

 

BUT in general the hospital was brilliant and the regular nurses were simply THE BEST. (and damn pretty in some cases now I think about it.....No wonder I tended to stay at the hospital all the time :) ....Nah, it was for my daughter, I was almost bereft with emotion, a topless model could have been standing in front of me and I'd not be on the same planet with grief.)

Edited by Mclaneinc
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If anyone on here from the UK see's a cheap PS4 while they are surfing would you be kind and PM me, its one thing I promised my daughter just before she went in to Hospital, she's a HUGE GTA 5 fan and I'd like to treat her as I promised (cash strapped hence looking for a decent 2nd hand one). I'm not so hot on these where the best place to look is and you guys often post epic deals on various stuff from places I'd never even heard of :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Mc

 

If anyone on here from the UK see's a cheap PS4 while they are surfing would you be kind and PM me, its one thing I promised my daughter just before she went in to Hospital, she's a HUGE GTA 5 fan and I'd like to treat her as I promised (cash strapped hence looking for a decent 2nd hand one). I'm not so hot on these where the best place to look is and you guys often post epic deals on various stuff from places I'd never even heard of :)

Do you have a PayPal address? I'd like to make a donation to the PS4 fund.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have a paypal account but never used it bar paying with my credit card?

 

Thank you for the offers guys, it means a lot and would make my daughter beam...

 

How do I do this?

 

Do I just send you the email associated with the account?

 

Totally new to me :)

 

Just showed my daughter and she had a tear in her eye and said thank you in the most cute sweet little voice, she's a little over awed as I am..

 

And what ever WILL go towards the PS4 for her, you have my word on that....

Edited by Mclaneinc
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have a paypal account but never used it bar paying with my credit card?

 

Thank you for the offers guys, it means a lot and would make my daughter beam...

 

How do I do this?

 

Do I just send you the email associated with the account?

 

Totally new to me :)

 

Just showed my daughter and she had a tear in her eye and said thank you in the most cute sweet little voice, she's a little over awed as I am..

 

And what ever WILL go towards the PS4 for her, you have my word on that....

 

All we will need is the email associated with your PayPal account to send money. When received, you'll be able to move it a credit card or even purchase the unit directly with Paypal funds.

 

I suggest anyone interested (and it sounds like several already have) PM you directly for that email address.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...