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What's your laughingly worst Atari 2600 game of all time?


MeneerJansen

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Bi! Bi!

 

Got this game in the bundle I got my first 2600 with. Easily the worst game in there and the bundle had E.T. which I admit is one of my favorites.

 

 

Also this cover

 

https://atariage.com/cart_page.php?SoftwareLabelID=1619

 

Looks like that scene from Futurama where Fry and the mermaid are cheering on the giant squid trying to kill the whale

Yes, Bi! Bi! is even worse than the original Skindiver.

 

Bi! Bi! was released with a bug that causes you to get stuck at the start of the second level (as shown in the video).

 

8)

Edited by Rom Hunter
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You sound like someone who would like Raiders of the Lost Ark on the VCS after reading the manual. Even more so because of your choice of avatar.

 

Yeah yeah, "look up the manual online" or something. My point is that context matters, and a really good Atari game should be intuitive enough to be understood on its own. Adventure, Haunted House, and Superman are similarly abstract, but not completely inscrutable.

LOL

 

Are you kidding me??

 

Back in 1983, I played Raiders for weeks almost every day (ofcourse after examining the manual - reading the manual is part of the whole RotLA gaming experience, just like reading the manual of Riddle of the Sphinx is) and I enjoyed every second of it.

 

The kick I got from finally digging up the Ark (without having read the solution) has never been equalled by any other video game I played afterwards (and I played a LOT of video games).

 

8)

Edited by Rom Hunter
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The kick I got from finally digging up the Ark (without having read the solution) has never been equalled by any other video game I played afterwards (and I played a LOT of video games).

Heh heh heh, awesome! I'm honestly glad someone got some pleasure out of that game.

 

I read the solution, got the Ark, and never went back to the game again. Naturally I missed out on the satisfaction of "a job well done," but then I've always had the attention span of a squirrel.

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Firefly is hands down the worst game and easily the laughingly worst. The game is bad for your hearing and will make you want to blowyour ear drums out it's that bad. And also it's difficult to control the firefly sprite. I Want My Mommy gets a close second. That game try makes no sense controlling a frantic toddler with a faster paced sound tempo the higher up you get to reach an apple and a teddy bear and some item you grab makes the child go into a temper tantrum and knocking out the enemies.

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I've seen the "if you need to RTFM, the game sucks" argument before. That point of view undergirds a lot of the Angry Video Game Nerd's stuff, a lot of which boils down to: this game makes me feel helpless and stupid, so it sucks.

 

But I don't really buy it; companies were trying to create worlds that exceeded what the console could do without added context, and so manuals and maps are the ticket (many people kvetch about getting lost in games that actually came with very clear physical maps). They had no reason to pay any consideration to people buying loose carts on the used market.

 

I personally enjoyed Raiders a lot more than Superman or Haunted House -- well, I liked Superman, but I was never a huge fan of the disorienting non-linear world layout. Haunted House, meh. I didn't own Adventure as a kid and can't get into it now, though I appreciate what it contributed, but like Superman it has a non-intuitive world layout that puts me off.

 

My mom and I figured Raiders out together back sometime around 1983, and had a great time with it. Finally solving the whole thing -- pulling off the parachute glide, holding on to the shovel for long enough -- was a rush.

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Sea Hunt, aka Skin Diver, aka You Die!

Step one: Jump in water. You can't move. If hit by fish, You Die!

Step two: Kill fish with chain gun. Aim for nose or chain passes through. If you miss, You Die!

Step three move fast before more fish appear. You can not leave if there are fish.

Step four. Collect treasure from maze. Don't touch wall or you get stuck. If stuch, You Die!

Step five. Kill fish again. Hurry before timer runs out (forgot to mention timer?) If timer runs out, You Die!

Step seven: Go to boat, collect points. Yes, you go through all that torture and with a score of zero as final insult unless you win round.

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Sea Hunt, aka Skin Diver, aka You Die!

Step one: Jump in water. You can't move. If hit by fish, You Die!

Step two: Kill fish with chain gun. Aim for nose or chain passes through. If you miss, You Die!

Step three move fast before more fish appear. You can not leave if there are fish.

Step four. Collect treasure from maze. Don't touch wall or you get stuck. If stuch, You Die!

Step five. Kill fish again. Hurry before timer runs out (forgot to mention timer?) If timer runs out, You Die!

Step seven: Go to boat, collect points. Yes, you go through all that torture and with a score of zero as final insult unless you win round.

LOL

 

That really sums it up.

 

I played it right now, and I got very, very lucky:

post-6203-0-22885000-1448299782_thumb.gif

 

Returned to my boat with treasures two times in a row!

 

I don't think I will ever get this far for the rest of my life.

 

8)

 

 

 

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@Sega_Shark - I was going to say Bugs also. Great choice! Seems Data Age is getting no love in this thread.

 

I remember buying Bugs as a kid with money I had saved. I clearly remember thinking a game about bugs would be cool. Then, lo and behold, at Toys R Us, there was a game called Bugs! Without hesitation, I bought it. Obviously the excitement didn't last long after playing the turd. I didn't understand how to play it then and I still don't quite understand it now. I always felt I was playing it wrong, but I'm pretty sure it's just a crappy game.

 

Airlock has gotten a few mentions. I own it but haven't played it much so I'll have to give it a "hate play" here soon!

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LOL

 

That really sums it up.

 

I played it right now, and I got very, very lucky:

attachicon.gifz26p0000.gif

 

Returned to my boat with treasures two times in a row!

 

I don't think I will ever get this far for the rest of my life.

 

8)

 

 

 

My high score strategy for Scuba Diver is to clear out all the fish, then hang out off to the side and just keep killing fish as they regenerate, going up for air as necessary. I don't even bother going after treasure.

 

Saddest thing about this: I actually have a strategy for Scuba Diver.

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After dismissing a lot of these 2600 games out of hand for years, I have played some of them to death for my show and found they were not as bad to me as I built them up to be (most of the Data Age games for sure). I have found a few that I absolutely loathe, one of which has already been mentioned (Skeet Shoot). I will go with Sneak n Peek as the worst. F**k that game.

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Sneak n Peek gets a lot of hate, but I never understood why. 1P mode is dull, but it can be fun with another person. There's not much to it, sure, but what can you expect from a hide-'n'-seek game? The ridiculously out-of-tune music is more funny than anything, and there's also humor value in the sprites, which look a lot more...excited...than I assume the designers intended.

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Sneak n Peek gets a lot of hate, but I never understood why. 1P mode is dull, but it can be fun with another person. There's not much to it, sure, but what can you expect from a hide-'n'-seek game? The ridiculously out-of-tune music is more funny than anything, and there's also humor value in the sprites, which look a lot more...excited...than I assume the designers intended.

 

Growing up, I used to go the grocery store with my grandmother. Up and down the aisles we'd go, until one day - I saw a cardboard standee full of US Games/VidTec Atari games. Can't remember what all was jammed into the cubby holes, but Sneak 'N Peek caught my eye for whatever reason. Game looked cool enough I guess and was priced right as I came home with it. The game is what it is. Definitely has its charms, but I remember playing it with my grandmother and cousin once in a while too - which was an extremely rare occurrence.

 

'Course, haven't touched it since then and probably won't - but I keep the game and its box around for nostalgic reasons. Like so much of this stuff I guess. Same deal with Journey Escape and Bermuda Triangle. Another standee at the same grocery store. :lol:

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I would vote for x-man

tumblr_m3hsvb6XaU1rubesho2_1280.png

 

A lot has been said about Atari adult games, but personally I have to disagree with most of the sh*t they throw at them.

They are amusing, and the graphics aren't THAT bad. But they are only good for some laughs and fun with friends.

After a while they are repetitive and dull.

 

But X-Men... that's a totally different league! Its just a maze with only 1 way to go. At some point you can wonder off a few blocks but not far. At the end of a maze you have a critter that will bite your nuts off. The critter goes in the opposite direction of you so at some point you'll have to pass it. You can only hope that the thing will (by d*mn luck) pass you from 1 or 2 blocks away. But this is totally random so there is no skill involved. To make things worse the controls are broken, half of the time your player won't go to the direction you want. Once you reach the end you get some cheesy animation of terrible quality(you'll have to google this yourself because I don't want to burn your eyes). Here it is your duty to get in rhythm for a climax. This concept is not new, but I have never seen such a bad execution of that rhythm engine.

If you pass that point by succeeding or not, you'll be presented with the next maze. There are only a few mazes but what is the point? You are just waiting till your luck runs out anyway.

 

That's what I call the worst Atari game. And now they ask over 200 USD for boxed copy -.-"

Edited by DrWho198
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I'm going to have to vote for Wall Ball because it looks like it would be fun but it is impossible to get a groove at lining up the paddle because it is too hard to tell where the ball will go which is probably why they give you 99 lives which isn't a blessing but a curse because you hear that Operation like buzz 99 times and likely didn't even finish the level after using them all up.

 

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Easily my NTSC Pac-Man cart which i play on my PAL console. If someone thinks normal Pac-Man sucks, they should try it in fabulous pink and gray with the usual flicker.

I tried selling it to terrorists to use as a torture device but they turned me down and called me an inhumane monster.


post-39169-0-70154400-1401545555_thumb.jpg

Edited by Raticon
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Easily my NTSC Pac-Man cart which i play on my PAL console. If someone thinks normal Pac-Man sucks, they should try it in fabulous pink and gray with the usual flicker.

 

I tried selling it to terrorists to use as a torture device but they turned me down and called me an inhumane monster.

 

 

 

 

You get to play the attract screen.. Cool.
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I would vote for x-man

tumblr_m3hsvb6XaU1rubesho2_1280.png

 

A lot has been said about Atari adult games, but personally I have to disagree with most of the sh*t they throw at them.

They are amusing, and the graphics aren't THAT bad. But they are only good for some laughs and fun with friends.

After a while they are repetitive and dull.

 

But X-Men... that's a totally different league! Its just a maze with only 1 way to go. At some point you can wonder off a few blocks but not far. At the end of a maze you have a critter that will bite your nuts off. The critter goes in the opposite direction of you so at some point you'll have to pass it. You can only hope that the thing will (by d*mn luck) pass you from 1 or 2 blocks away. But this is totally random so there is no skill involved. To make things worse the controls are broken, half of the time your player won't go to the direction you want. Once you reach the end you get some cheesy animation of terrible quality(you'll have to google this yourself because I don't want to burn your eyes). Here it is your duty to get in rhythm for a climax. This concept is not new, but I have never seen such a bad execution of that rhythm engine.

If you pass that point by succeeding or not, you'll be presented with the next maze. There are only a few mazes but what is the point? You are just waiting till your luck runs out anyway.

 

That's what I call the worst Atari game. And now they ask over 200 USD for boxed copy -.-"

Wouhar! That's exactly what I meant when I started the topic. Only on the Atari you could release such games. They were different times back then! Unique in the history. On other systems (the PC springs to mind) there were some pretty stupendous games released that'll give a big smile on your face, but especially for the PC and the C64 literally anybody could program a game. In the 70's and early 80's a computer was a pretty serious thing and you simply could not believe that anybody would go to all the trouble to release a turd of a game that's an insult to the buyer. You always felt sincerely surprised that they'd actually had the nerve and the money to pull this sort of thing off.

 

Unfortunately I've got two versions of this game that won't work in Stella.

Edited by MeneerJansen
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Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I remember pre-ordering this from Wizard video games (they used to have ads in Fangoria). I loved the movie and was very curious of the idea that they would be turning the movie into a video game on the Atari. I also remember it taking forever to ship. Wow, was I disappointed when it finally did arrive. I still have the original cart.

 

texasChainsaw2600.jpg

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