Coleco Chameleon .... hardware speculations?

[mgman]

And even with its shutdown, there are still people calling for blood, if only because they think Mike pulled a fast one or something. That's not the case.

 

The truth is, I know nothing about it.

I know nothing about the situation, so believe me when i say you're all wrong.

[Flojomojo]

well we're still owed TWO issues

 

:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:

Heh, do you really care?

"The food is terrible here. And such small portions."

[CPUWIZ]

http://hackaday.com/2016/03/10/yet-another-kickstarter-scam/

[Flojomojo]

No idea who he is, but If his work is as well put together as that fb post I don't think anyone will miss him.

 

I never bothered to read most of the RETRO PDF issues I paid for because I was so unimpressed with the online reviews on their site. There were so many more hoary chestnuts than original thoughts that I stood up and noticed the byline on all of them. Workmanlike, indeed. Check them out, every single one of them has a cheese ball intro that makes me roll my eyes right out of my head and ask, "who wrote this shit?"

 

Dust off those plastic guitars, because it's time to set the stage on fire in Rock Band 4! Robert riffs out his killer review of the return of this popular franchise.

 

Prepare for a new kind of "fantasy football" with Blood Bowl 2! Robert hits the field with his review of this turn-based take on America's most popular sport.

 

Run up the field and go for the goal inFIFA 16! Robert kicks off his review of the latest entry in the popular soccer franchise.

 

Put on your skates and get those sticks ready, because it's time for NHL 16! Robert hits the ice in his review.

 

Stay on the move in classic platforming fashion with Wind-Up Knight 2! Robert doesn't stop for anyone in his review.

 

Take up the blade once more in Afro Samurai 2! Robert shows why you should fear the fro in his review.

 

Play as predator and prey in Desert Demolition! Robert renews his Acme membership card in his review of this "Looney" Genesis title.

 

Experience classic arcade shooting with Steel Gunner! Robert locks and loads his review of this old school, Namco title.

 

This is one game where you want to be caught red-handed! Robert gives his hands-on impressions of the 2D side-scrolling shooter I Want To Be Human.

 

Move through levels where only the shadows are your friends in One Upon A Light! Robert embraces the darkness in his preview of this unique indie game.

 

Step into the Star Wars universe with the power of Disney Infinity 3.0 Edition! Robert harnesses the power of the Force in his review.

 

Take the Tomb Raider experience with you in Lara Croft GO! Robert takes this daring dame out in his review.

 

 

I don't expect much from video games journalism, but I learned that this page is not for me.

[toiletunes]

Sloppy journalism at its finest...

 

edit: I meant the inaccurate hackaday piece, but it might apply to Retro too...

[Flojomojo]

Sloppy journalism at its finest...

 

I think it's just lazy and amateurish, like the Videogame Critic. There's nothing wrong with that, but they want so badly to be the second coming of EGM (and had a lot of good writers lined up) that it's odd that their online stuff was so lackluster.

[+madman]

http://hackaday.com/2016/03/10/yet-another-kickstarter-scam/

Wow, someone presumably got paid to write that? They "slipped up trying to meet demand?" So if there was less demand, they would've actually made something, but so many people wanted their product that they decided to just fake it instead? This makes no sense. Delayed shipments would be a symptom of trying to meet demand. Stuffing a PCI card in a Jag case is a scam.

[+Nathan Strum]

 

I never bothered to read most of the RETRO PDF issues I paid for because I was so unimpressed with the online reviews on their site. There were so many more hoary chestnuts than original thoughts that I stood up and noticed the byline on all of them. Workmanlike, indeed. Check them out, every single one of them has a cheese ball intro that makes me roll my eyes right out of my head and ask, "who wrote this shit?"

 

 

Dust off those plastic guitars, because it's time to set the stage on fire in Rock Band 4! Robert riffs out his killer review of the return of this popular franchise.

Prepare for a new kind of "fantasy football" with Blood Bowl 2! Robert hits the field with his review of this turn-based take on America's most popular sport.

Run up the field and go for the goal inFIFA 16! Robert kicks off his review of the latest entry in the popular soccer franchise.

Put on your skates and get those sticks ready, because it's time for NHL 16! Robert hits the ice in his review.

Stay on the move in classic platforming fashion with Wind-Up Knight 2! Robert doesn't stop for anyone in his review.

Take up the blade once more in Afro Samurai 2! Robert shows why you should fear the fro in his review.

Play as predator and prey in Desert Demolition! Robert renews his Acme membership card in his review of this "Looney" Genesis title.

Experience classic arcade shooting with Steel Gunner! Robert locks and loads his review of this old school, Namco title.

This is one game where you want to be caught red-handed! Robert gives his hands-on impressions of the 2D side-scrolling shooter I Want To Be Human.

Move through levels where only the shadows are your friends in One Upon A Light! Robert embraces the darkness in his preview of this unique indie game.

Step into the Star Wars universe with the power of Disney Infinity 3.0 Edition! Robert harnesses the power of the Force in his review.

Take the Tomb Raider experience with you in Lara Croft GO! Robert takes this daring dame out in his review.

 

 

Wow... and I thought my writing was cheesy.

 

Let's see... how about:

 

"Brace for impact haters, because it's time for RETRO Magazine to go down in flames! Robert assumes the crash position as he jumps ship from this catastrophic quagmire!"

 

Or something like that.

[jaybird3rd]

I bet somebody could automatically generate review intros just like those by writing a simple script. Just plug in a verb, a couple of nouns and adjectives, and lots of exclamation points, and bingo! Instant RETRO Magazine journalism.

[+madman]

I bet somebody could automatically generate review intros just like those by writing a simple script. Just plug in a verb, a couple of nouns and adjectives, and lots of exclamation points, and bingo! Instant RETRO Magazine journalism.

I don't think just anyone could do that, they'd have to be an entrepreneur through and through, one interested in cornering the market on the retro gaming journalism industry. Simple as that.

 

OK, I'm done now.

[jaybird3rd]

You know, I think we just gave Mike an idea of how he can continue the magazine without having to hire replacements for his diminishing staff. I wonder if "The Mysterious Mr. Lee" can write scripts for him, too. I wonder if any of their readers would notice the difference.

[Shamus]

There's websites that generate this kind of thing. Something along the lines of:

 

"She's a <adjective> <noun>, he's a <adjective> <noun>. They fight crime!!"

 

Anywho, just thought I'd echo Albert's sentiment on the Dangerous Analysis piece on the whole CC debacle. Excellent stuff!

[Osgeld]

Wow, someone presumably got paid to write that? They "slipped up trying to meet demand?" So if there was less demand, they would've actually made something, but so many people wanted their product that they decided to just fake it instead? This makes no sense. Delayed shipments would be a symptom of trying to meet demand. Stuffing a PCI card in a Jag case is a scam.

 

I have worked for them in the past, they dont get paid much

[+remowilliams]

there are still people calling for blood, if only because they think Mike pulled a fast one or something. That's not the case.

 

He's a compassionate guy and took even more flack for the Chameleon than anyone we could imagine

 

 

Well the first part is true, he didn't pull a fast one. He failed before he got the actual chance to pull the fast one. Twice. Well that's uh, admirable isn't it... ?

 

Easy way to avoid part two - don't attempt to scam people. Twice.

[BawesomeBurf]

4. The name change

RetroVGS was fine, and a much more apt name.

Slapping the Coleco name on it was a bit misleading, but the original name definitely needed to change. Retro VGS is such a generic and unimaginative name. I do agree with your other points though.

[PlaysWithWolves]

I just want to point out that this screenshot is the first time (that I can find) Robert Workman's name has been brought up in this thread. I'm a little curious who demanded he fall on his sword.

 

 

 

rw.png

 

[BawesomeBurf]

Personally, I'd like to see a Coleco Mini.

 

The Colecovision was half empty anyway. All of the part with the controller paddles was empty inside I think.

 

IIRC, it also had one of those awful big ass wall adapters. Why not build all of that into the system and just use a standard plug? I could be mistaken though, since it has been a while since I've seen a Colecovision.

[Flojomojo]

I just want to point out that this screenshot is the first time (that I can find) Robert Workman's name has been brought up in this thread. I'm a little curious who demanded he fall on his sword.

 

He also posted it on David Giltinian's wall, which is probably where it was picked up. I guess Robert just wanted a little piece of the drama for himself.

 

[Flojomojo]

IIRC, it also had one of those awful big ass wall adapters. Why not build all of that into the system and just use a standard plug? I could be mistaken though, since it has been a while since I've seen a Colecovision.

I'm no electrical engineer, but I would think the usual reasons would be: to keep the inside of the system cool and ventilated, and to allow for easy swaps of external power supplies for shipping to other countries with different electrical standards. It's also easier to replace the parts if they're external. As for why the case is mostly air? I guess because they like to have a spot for the controllers (less mess), and the big box would be impressive at retail and at gift-giving time.

 

Even the Coleco Flashback is way bigger than it needs to be. It's mostly air inside, the computer portion is the size of a pack of gum.

[7800fan]

http://hackaday.com/2016/03/10/yet-another-kickstarter-scam/

 

Rubbing salt on Mike? Not only is yet another site calling out the scam, it wasn't well written like Mike didn't deserve a nice written article explaining the whole fiasco.

[CPUWIZ]

 

Rubbing salt on Mike? Not only is yet another site calling out the scam, it wasn't well written like Mike didn't deserve a nice written article explaining the whole fiasco.

 

Just pointing out how the internet works, when you fuck up.

[Pipercub]

 

I think it's just lazy and amateurish, like the Videogame Critic. There's nothing wrong with that, but they want so badly to be the second coming of EGM (and had a lot of good writers lined up) that it's odd that their online stuff was so lackluster.

That guy is an epic hack, he called CGE Adventures a confusing bunch of turns that end in dead ends, it's a MAZE GAME asshole.

 

Cool with edits by mods if that is too direct.

Edited March 11, 2016 by Pipercub

[jennytablina]

I just want to point out that this screenshot is the first time (that I can find) Robert Workman's name has been brought up in this thread. I'm a little curious who demanded he fall on his sword.

 

 

I wondered if he was the Janus guy but that was Co-Founder/Creative Director of RETRO Mark Kaminski, not this guy.

 

In all honesty AA's been pretty forgiving towards RETRO staff even though there's CoI's for them all over this mess. I'm not sure how they were expected to ever be able to be impartial or fair & objective on a system that originally was going to bear their name and had one of their founders speadheading it. How would that of worked? One poor review and Kennedy could just blacklist you for not "promoting sales" or just plain hurting his other business.

 

I mean I do feel for the staff a bit (though I gather most are freelancers anyway?) you probably felt you had to brown-nose lest you tested the above theory. But it's a two-edged sword as it stings your credibility too.

 

Also maybe just me, but considering mentions that RETRO is still 2 issues off last years promised quota + 2 major content writers mentioning a lack of work prior to jumping ship doesn't exactly sound healthy for the publication. Kinda makes it a wee bit obvious that Retro VGS/Chameleons crowdfunds were probably needed & intended to be used in a sneaky way to keep RETRO afloat too : P

[godslabrat]

IIRC, it also had one of those awful big ass wall adapters. Why not build all of that into the system and just use a standard plug? I could be mistaken though, since it has been a while since I've seen a Colecovision.

If you do that, it won't stay cool without a fan.

[CGQuarterly]

Wow... and I thought my writing was cheesy.

 

Let's see... how about:

 

"Brace for impact haters, because it's time for RETRO Magazine to go down in flames! Robert assumes the crash position as he jumps ship from this catastrophic quagmire!"

 

Or something like that.

I'd like to offer you a job as a staff writer at Classic Gaming Quarterly. It isn't a paying position, but you should be happy to do it in exchange for all of the added exposure that you'll get.

 

 

That guy is an epic hack, he called CGE Adventures a confusing bunch of turns that end in dead ends, it's a MAZE GAME asshole.

I used to really like that guy's website. Mainly I used to really like spacing out at my desk at work reading his reviews and making lists of games that I wanted to go home and play. But it's pretty obvious that he is just trying to pump out as many reviews as he can, as quickly as he can, without having to spend much time with each game.