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Top 10 Worst Atari 2600 Games? (Not counting E.T. or Pac-Man)


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There seems to be two competing schools of thought here: games that sucked upon first release, and games whose suckiness have increased to legendary status due to the conflation of media influence with the consensus of gamers who weren't alive at the time and have no conception of what gaming was like before, say the CV entered the picture. It's not like people could compare these games with a huge library, the way we can today. There was a choice of the 2600 or maybe Pong -- my friends and I didn't go around saying 'shit, the Odyssey can beat the crap out of this!' (someone must have owned them, but I never, ever saw a Channel F or O2 as a kid). I didn't have a VCS as a kid, and didn't want one, but did play the hell out of my friend's 'Combat' and 'Pac-Man' carts, and can't remember anyone saying at the time that they were crap ports of arcade hits. It's not like the average buyer was going to buy a dedicated arcade game for the home -- I didn't even know you could do that until I watched 'Silver Spoons'! And 'Combat' as a pick for worst game? Sheesh! 'Combat' was revolutionary!

 

I had more fun with Combat for the wrong reasons. If you crawl up behind another tank, and stick your gun in its, umm.. 'backside' , and then "jiggle it". Strange things happen. Both tanks might fly through walls. Please tell me I'm not the only one who discovered this? :grin:

 

Has there ever been a topic on exploiting glitches in 2600 games? There should be, there were some really cool glitches, and you could create others by toggling the power switch rapidly (probably not healthy for the system, but it never hurt ours :-D )

 

 

 

Except Pac-Man and ET were both HEAVILY returned by the consumers who bought those games back in the day. That's well documented, so it had nothing to do with a coloration of perception over time. I had a Coleco Vision in 1982, so I knew how good an arcade conversion look at home (Donkey Kong, Donkey Kong Jr., etc). We had the expansion module for playing 2600 games, and I remember enjoying playing Space Invaders, Combat and Kaboom! (our downstairs neighbors had this one). I didn't have E.T. personally, but I remember seeing it being played at my brother's friend's house. I distinctly remember watching E.T. constantly falling in holes, and I wanted nothing to do with that game.

 

ETs main problem was it never even came close to selling the kinds of numbers Atari had planned for. They made something like 7 million carts and only sold 1 million-- because the crash was beginning. But now that's been revised to "ET caused the crash!" (as if people stopped buying Colecovision and Intellivision games because ET existed on the 2600-- makes no sense!). I see it more as the victim of the crash. Once you get past the pit problem, it wasn't a bad game at all. There's a patched version around now that makes the pits much less sensitive

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I was under the impression that Atari's overproduction was one of the major factors leading up to the crash. I'd even heard E.T. had more copies made than Atari's install base at the time. Assuming that's true, whoever was in charge of that decision should have been shot. I'd like to see where the mass returns were documented, because that just doesn't make much sense to me. It's not like you can return a purchased game to a retailer because the game sucks...you'd have to at least make up that it was defective, and in that case typically they go for an exchange rather than a refund anyway. Anyway, I've always felt that E.T. wasn't too bad, it just would have benefited immensely if the programmer had another week or so to polish it up a bit. And frankly, unlike the bulk of the games being released on the VCS at the time of the crash, it was also a very unique game. For better or worse, it's not like you can find another game entirely like it...and to me, that gives it a HUGE plus.

 

As a side note, for anyone defending their choice of otherwise popular games, know that I feel your pain. I rank SMB3 as one of my worst NES games ever, and have had to explain that more often than I can count to the masses. Don't feel like your opinion is being challenged, just that people are more curious as to why you feel the opposite way from them :)

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I was under the impression that Atari's overproduction was one of the major factors leading up to the crash. I'd even heard E.T. had more copies made than Atari's install base at the time. Assuming that's true, whoever was in charge of that decision should have been shot. I'd like to see where the mass returns were documented, because that just doesn't make much sense to me. It's not like you can return a purchased game to a retailer because the game sucks...you'd have to at least make up that it was defective, and in that case typically they go for an exchange rather than a refund anyway. Anyway, I've always felt that E.T. wasn't too bad, it just would have benefited immensely if the programmer had another week or so to polish it up a bit. And frankly, unlike the bulk of the games being released on the VCS at the time of the crash, it was also a very unique game. For better or worse, it's not like you can find another game entirely like it...and to me, that gives it a HUGE plus.

 

As a side note, for anyone defending their choice of otherwise popular games, know that I feel your pain. I rank SMB3 as one of my worst NES games ever, and have had to explain that more often than I can count to the masses. Don't feel like your opinion is being challenged, just that people are more curious as to why you feel the opposite way from them :)

 

With all the mediocre games the fly-by-night 2600 publishers where pushing in 1982, I find it hard to believe that ET was the game that pushed the public over the edge and caused them to return it en-masse. I think the "returns" were from retailers who couldn't sell nearly the number of copies they bought.

 

Yes Atari allegedly made more carts than systems. But the thinking was the game would sell many systems that year. (and I can't say it was an entirely unsound idea-- problem was that young industry didn't yet have that much sales data history to tell them how many sales a game based on a major movie could expect to sell.).

 

At any rate, the media likes to repeat the narrative that a single game could be so bad that it destroys an entire industry. Lots of people now believe that. However it doesn't make sense to me.

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You'd think the ET graveyard would've proved it, what with all the other super popular and well regarded games that were also buried with E.T. It was one of the top ten best sellers on the VCS, so it was clearly a successful game, even if it wasn't the best. And if people thought Pac-Man was bad, it probably wouldn't have sold well enough to be the top selling VCS games ever. It was poor decisions like overestimating sales potential, coupled with the glut of mediocre copycat titles that were dominating shelves at the time, the rise of home computing, a short-lived recession in the US in '83, and probably a ton of other factors that all contributed to the collapse of the gaming industry. People look for a singular cause, but there wasn't one. No one issue would be enough to sink the industry, but a perfect storm of several seemingly minor contributors all at the same time would certainly do that.

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I think you're crackers for not liking Pitfall II, but at least you explained why.

 

Pitfall II is the most NES-like of any VCS game. How do you feel about NES?

 

I feel like butting in here for a moment. I can understand why people wouldn't like Pitfall II... it's not a favorite of mine, either. It just feels too far removed from the original game, with too much sprawl in the level design and too many goals to accomplish.

 

You mentioned that it resembles an NES game in its scope. Activision must have noticed that too, because Super Pitfall is essentially a loose NES conversion of Pitfall II. Problem is, it's not an especially GOOD conversion. Pitfall II was simple but attractive, like the best 2600 games, but Super Pitfall is butt-ugly from start to finish. I still marvel that this port on superior hardware wound up being so much worse than the original.

 

I only mentioned one game, so let's expand on that list a little. I'll dig through the reviews on my old web site for a few unworthy games worthy of discussing here.

 

ACID DROP: The ill-advised 2600 port of Columns. It's not only blocky and incomplete, it's got what sounds like a Beethoven concert performed by the Robot Devil Orchestra.

CRYPTS OF CHAOS: Some games just shouldn't be attempted on the 2600. This first-person RPG is one of them. It's like Wizardry for cavemen.

DEATH TRAP: A sorry shooter so drawn out it makes the Hobbit films look like an episode of Teen Titans Go!. Can I just quit already?

DOUBLE DRAGON: Double your displeasure, double your frustration! It's cute that someone at Activision thought this had a place in the 2600 library, though.

MINER 2049'ER VOL. 1 and 2: Two rotten halves of a hideous whole. Bounty Bob visited pretty much every early 1980s console, but apparently went here just to use the bathroom.

MINES OF MINOS: This was the only CommaVid game I ever had, I think. One was plenty. A slow, pointless maze game that makes 2600 Pac-Man shine by comparison.

MR. DO!'S CASTLE: A monstrously ugly port with a Mr. Do! who looks like he's masturbating. It's impossible to strike blocks with your (heh) hammer, making it pointless.

SCUBA DIVER: Russ Perry warned me about this one. He was absolutely right, you know. Jump off the edge of your boat and CHOMP, you're fish food.

SPRINGER: The story of a rabbit with barely any jumping prowess, not a sleazy talk show host who exploits horny hillbillies. Somebody give me THAT on the 2600!

SSSNAKE: It's been said a thousand times, but Sssnake sssucks. It's kind of like Centipede, except you have barely any room to move.

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I think you're crackers for not liking Pitfall II, but at least you explained why.

 

Pitfall II is the most NES-like of any VCS game. How do you feel about NES?

 

I've never been a fan of Pitfall II either. It's an amazing technical achievement, but as a game it's irritating and monotonous. I wouldn't call it one of the 10 worst games ever, there are far too many genuinely broken games for that, but maybe one of the most overrated and definitely not my cup of tea.

Edited by KaeruYojimbo
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Excel magazine no.1 features a reprint of a pretty interesting article from what appears to be a British magazine entitled 'After the Crash'. While it mixes rumour and speculation with fact (450 000 copies of ET and Raiders in the desert! (ok, there's truth in that one)The 1200XL was a prototype that was never intended to be given a commercial release! And it's 100% incompatible with any extant Atari product!) it contains an interesting contemporary perspective. Raiders was a 'misunderstood' and 'thoughtful' game which was 'too difficult' for gamers. No comment on the merits (or lack of) of ET, though.

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I've never been a fan of Pitfall II either. It's an amazing technical achievement, but as a game it's irritating and monotonous. I wouldn't call it one of the 10 worst games ever, there are far too many genuinely broken games for that, but maybe one of the most overrated and definitely not my cup of tea.

 

I found the original Pitfall to be monotonous. I loved Pitfall II because it mixed things up

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Realized I had not come up with a list yet as most all of them have been covered, so I'll take a slightly different route and only mention the games I had as a kid that I thought were the "worst" in my collection BITD:

 

Swordquest Earthworld & Fireworld - arcane crap, barely fun just screwing around trying to play the mini games.

Sssnake / Bugs - played for a few minutes when first purchased, only to never touch again. lol

Fire Fly - bought at Kay*Bee for $1 and was still disappointed. Not much of a game there at all.

Atari Video Cube - never subscribed to the Atari Age mag and don't remember how/why I ended up with it, but I did. sigh

Megamania - too abstract and spazzy for my tastes. Utterly pointless shooter IMO.

Laser Blast - awfully repetitive + minimal gameplay = boring after a few minutes.

Private Eye - more sophisticated version of Pitfall! I guess, but that's not saying much if we're being honest.

Riddle of the Sphinx - a game I always wanted to like, but somewhat boring when it comes down to it.

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I found the original Pitfall to be monotonous. I loved Pitfall II because it mixed things up

I don't love the first Pitfall either, but I find it more enjoyable than Pitfall II. Grind was a great way to describe the sequel. It seems like it's nothing but climb a ladder, avoid the bat, climb a ladder, avoid a bat, and on and on. There may only be a few possible screen variations in the first game, but at least every screen is different from the last.

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I don't love the first Pitfall either, but I find it more enjoyable than Pitfall II. Grind was a great way to describe the sequel. It seems like it's nothing but climb a ladder, avoid the bat, climb a ladder, avoid a bat, and on and on. There may only be a few possible screen variations in the first game, but at least every screen is different from the last.

 

Is it really though? You had pit with alligators, pit without crocodiles, same pit opening/closing, and swinging vines for when there were no crocodiles. Sure the pit changed from blue to black sometimes to designate water/void/quicksand, but the graphic was identical otherwise. Or you could take the underground route and encounter a scorpion on virtually every screen. It was just a few variations on the same basic screen

 

Pitfall II added swimming, balloon riding, ducking under birds, vertical and horizontal levels, strategic falling to avoid creatures, and checkpoints so you don't start from scratch, and an actual objective other than "how many screens can you survive?"

 

Yes Pitfall II is frustrating and I usually switch it off after a couple of deaths. But I don't feel like there's a point to playing the first at all anymore.

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Is it really though? You had pit with alligators, pit without crocodiles, same pit opening/closing, and swinging vines for when there were no crocodiles. Sure the pit changed from blue to black sometimes to designate water/void/quicksand, but the graphic was identical otherwise. Or you could take the underground route and encounter a scorpion on virtually every screen. It was just a few variations on the same basic screen

 

Pitfall II added swimming, balloon riding, ducking under birds, vertical and horizontal levels, strategic falling to avoid creatures, and checkpoints so you don't start from scratch, and an actual objective other than "how many screens can you survive?"

 

Yes Pitfall II is frustrating and I usually switch it off after a couple of deaths. But I don't feel like there's a point to playing the first at all anymore.

I think we've reached the point of agree to disagree. Here's the last thing I'll say about Pitfall vs. Pitfall II:

 

The original uses different combinations of a few elements to create an illusion of variety. You never get the same combination from one screen to the next.

 

However, large sections of Pitfall II are climb to a platform, avoid an enemy, climb to a new platform, avoid the same kind of enemy. Balloon riding and swimming are very small parts of the game in comparison.

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Well, I fired up a few games last night (had a couple Coleco published carts that wouldn't run, so I fired all of mine up to see if it was a universal issue with the publisher...and it wasn't), and I have to say, while none of them really grabbed me, the 2600 versions of DK Jr and Mr Do! are both utterly terrible. While none of the games I played were gems, those two ended up being the cream of the crap, so to speak. Both of them do the absolute bare minimum with the source material and end up not only playing like ass, but not even getting the "arcade at home" feel right. Donkey Kong may have sucked, but at least it feels like Donkey Kong should. Even Pac-Man still feels like Pac-Man at a fundamental level, for all it's flaws.

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I tried to have people only used to more modern platformers play Pitfall II, and it seemed the jumping mechanic and certain obstacles resulted in a lot of frustration rather than fun, so I can see someone getting annoyed and hating this game. I enjoy it but can see other people not being as thrilled.

 

10 worst games? Hrmmmm... in no order:

 

01.) Double Dragon (oy vey so unplayable!)

02.) Mr. Do (it is very hard to figure out what is even happening)

03.) Either Swordquest (I had no idea what to do because of no comicbook!)

04.) Tutankhamen (pretty ugly game, unfortunate translation of the coin-op)

05.) Donkey Kong Jr. (barely even recognisable!)

06.) Starfox (I was introduced late to this game and ... oy.)

07.) Karate (it looks as bad as it plays)

08.) Sssssnake (ssssssucks -- I'm sure that's not new)

09.) Miner 2049'er (after playing other versions this was truly disappointing)

10.) Kung Fu Master (it looks fine but it is so so difficult to play!)

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