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Goochman

New Atari Console that Ataribox?

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Thousand pages deep and those poor backers still have nothing to show. Id be pissed after forking out $300+ on vaporware yet still having nothing in my hands. I feel bad for them and we should start a go-taco-me campaign so atleast they will have something fulfilling.

 

Correction: 1001

Edited by TwentySixHundred
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5 hours ago, x=usr(1536) said:

This is important.

 

Gqm3iMH.pngthose are pretty lame, wouldnt recommend to anyone, also they used to be 1000 tacos x 1000 pesos about 5 years ago.

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Maybe we could crowdfund turning this thread into a deluxe hardbound book so it can be gifted to pigeons and enjoyed for years to come.

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1 hour ago, TACODON said:

Maybe we could crowdfund turning this thread into a deluxe hardbound book so it can be gifted to pigeons and enjoyed for years to come.

Only if the campaign promises to preserve all the color pictures, videos, and animations... then delays the delivery when they realize the interactive elements won't translate to paper. 

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13 hours ago, digdugnate said:

why are you guys wasting time on here?  due to overwhelming demand, the Werner Group are doing t-shirts!!

 

 

1174583494_ScreenShot2019-12-26at8_13_30PM.thumb.png.cc8eb235d15904415db146b5ba36885c.png

Here's my entry...

1082751640_AtariShirt.thumb.jpg.e3d23cb81f82162db4ad6d15da841471.jpg

 

* Atari logo replaced with French Beret...for obvious reasons

 

Edited by MrMaddog
Graphic disclaimer
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Can I just say that Atari's Twitter is tedious as hell?

 

"What's your favorite Atari memory?"

"What's your favorite Atari game?"
"Retweet if you're a retrogamer"

"What was the first Atari game you played?"

"We all have a beloved Atari memory. What's yours?"

"Retweet if you're a retrogamer" (yes, twice)

 

Hey, Atari...

 

 

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This is what happens, when I leave a bowl of them on the table and my wife is bored, then fucks around with my hot sauce.

IMG-7175.JPG

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5 hours ago, GoldLeader said:

I wish I knew how to Photoshop because I'd like to enter their T-shirt design contest!

Not needed. Go to any one of the online custom T-shirt sellers, use their online tools to craft an appropriate design, then just take a screenshot of it.

 

2F23A6CC-7B3D-4B16-AF54-10FB20AC6FFE.thumb.jpeg.a389471e35e1e20aa8e41db46d44c976.jpeg

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I have access to a limited supply of these official logo shirts! Only $49.99 shipped anywhere in the United States!! Please allow up to 24 months for delivery. 
 

https://www.target.com/p/men-s-atari-logo-graphic-t-shirt-charcoal/-/A-52822889
 

FAQ
 

Why do I have to wait longer than usual?

 

We need your input to know how many to buy! And you'll be part of the reselling process. I'll send you photos of my trip to Target, and the junk food I might eat while I'm in the store. Sometimes they have those nasty little Pizza Hut thousand calorie pies. Then I'll invite you to a top secret exclusive web experience where you can see some of the Atari games I've played on the fabulous Atari Vault(tm). Every step of the way will be done with transparency except when they aren't. 
 

Void where prohibited. Some restrictions apply. All rights reserved. Perks not guaranteed. Items shown are for illustration purposes only. No refunds. 

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^^^ Dang Namit! I missed out on the Bestbuy boxing day sales, the Atari Flashback Vol.1 Blast! Micro-Console was $7.99, now I will have to pay the regular high everyday price of $9.99, deal is off. They also have a $30 PacMan +300 retro games handheld console ($40 for 400 games), freakin' 10 cents a game, they have to be reaaaly crappy, because I cannot see them getting any liscence to good games for that price. Must be Action 52 quality. I once bought a console for $2.96 from The Source (AKA Radio Shack) freakin intec piece of crap, looks like what the Atari VCS is going to look like, I kid Ye not!
The only reason I would see anyone buying this thing for $8 is because they need to get over the $35 for free shipping, basically what we call a "filler item" shipping is $6.99, game console is $7.99, I can see the Atari VCS falling into this selling model, just anything to get them out the door.

Perhaps Atari should pay to have a product placement with Deadpool playing a crappy 2600 remake of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre on the new VCS in Deadpool#3, but that is a good 2 years away, Atari probably will not be finished making the console by then--- ZING!

Edited by OCAT
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13 hours ago, MrBeefy said:

Our thread count doesn't mean we've won or anything. Their lack of being able to do stuff shows how lost this projects been. There really aren't any winners unless you like tacos.

I agree - I was being facetious, in the vain of the avid VCS supporters. 

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We don't reuse pictures as much as "Atari" does. 
 

kf7ck13jpdld44wacy6e.jpg
 

Too bad the same can't be said about our "arguments." Yes yes, ATARI VCS 2020 is weak sauce, we get it! 😂😂😂😂😂

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22 minutes ago, Flojomojo said:

We don't reuse pictures as much as "Atari" does. 
 

kf7ck13jpdld44wacy6e.jpg
 

Too bad the same can't be said about our "arguments." Yes yes, ATARI VCS 2020 is weak sauce, we get it! 😂😂😂😂😂

 

I wonder if Atari did the basic courtesy of asking for permission to use that picture?  

 

https://m.imgur.com/gallery/2EwON

 

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4 minutes ago, PlaysWithWolves said:

I wonder if Atari did the basic courtesy of asking for permission to use that picture?  

 

https://m.imgur.com/gallery/2EwON

Evidence for "probably not:"

- Atari's Twitter steals online photos all the time. It's especially amusing when they make clear they have no idea what they're talking about. 

- Atari's official IP holdings PDF contains screenshots and box scans sources from ROM sites and AtariAge, in some cases with watermarks intact

- Atari under Chesnais is kind of a butthole and they smell bad, too. 

 

Evidence for "maybe they did:"

- Anyone using their logo to sell a sticker or T-shirt gets sued which demonstrates an understanding and respect for their own IP, even as they trample on others. 

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THE 1000 + PAGE RECAP

================

A long, long time ago... On a website far, far away...

Atari - Guess what, we're gonna make a console...

Internet - Yea... Right...

Atari - Don't doubt us, we're really gonna do it...

Internet - Tell us another tall tale...

Atari - All you got to do is... GIVE US YOUR MONEY !

Internet - We knew there was a catch to this...

Atari - We'll call it "Ataribox"

Internet - What a stupid name, people will get it mixed up with the Xbox...

Atari - Okay we changed our minds, we'll call it the Atari VCS...

Internet - Great, now folks will get it mixed up with the 2600 as it is also known as the VCS...

Atari - We're going with Indiegogo...

Indiegogo - You don't have to have a working anything to use our services, come right in Atari...

Atari - Not to worry Internet we'll keep you up to date on what we're doing...

~ Time Passes ~

Internet - This has to be a scam, there hasn't been any updates for months...

VCS fans - You all are just haters, give them time...

~ More Time Passes ~

Atari - We're making an announcement that there will be an announcement soon (tm)

VCS fans - see we told you so...

~ Yet even more time passes ~

Atari - We promise we'll have something to show soon (tm)

~ Sometime later ~

[ Insert video of someone playing Tempest 4000 here ]

VCS fans - ooooooooo, aaaaahhhhh, woooooow

Tempest 4000 programmers - That video is a fake as no one here is working on a port for the Atari VCS...  

VCS fans - ....

Atari - Uhm... Look... it says demo only right there on the video...

~ Things go quiet for awhile ~

Atari - We'll have something to show this 'Summer'

~ Summer Passes ~

Internet  - Well ?

~ Fall Starts ~

Atari - We got something to show now...

[ Shows off 'the board' ]

VCS fans - see you were worried over nothing...

Internet - That's nice, where is the RAM ?

[ News leaks about the main guy working on the innards gets out ]

Internet - Oh this just keeps getting better...

Atari - Watch this...

[ Video / Gif of the logo going on & off on the Unit ]

VCS fans - see it works...

Me - a $400.00 light switch, I'm not impressed...

~ Time Marches On ~

> ENTER THE WOZ ! <

Internet - Oh this ought to be good...

[ Lots of photos uploaded but no video of the actual event ]

Internet - This seems to be a non-event as there's not much news attached to this, gee that don't seem weird to you does it ?

Me - Oh look at all that nice white space over WOZ & Fred, time for MEMEs

~ Several Memes Later ~

Atari - Another Announcement About An Announcement About An Announcement About An Announcement About Something Or Other

Internet - This is getting redonkulous...

Me - Loading... Still Loading... Still Still Loading... Etc... Etc... Ect...

Atari - We're delaying it AGAIN...

Internet - Why are we not shocked by this...

> 2019 Ends in a few days ! <

[ There we go, up to date now, yes ? ]

Sorry it took so long, but I wanted to reformat the old post so you wouldn't have to scroll as much to read it all in one sitting

 

> MEANWHILE <

 

Loading7.jpg

 

P.S. Yes this was a LONG way to go just so I could do a MAXIS reference ;-)

 

Edited by Woulfe
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21 hours ago, jaybird3rd said:

Just because you can't see something doesn't mean it isn't there.  The posts still count because they're still in the database.

 

Yeah, but I'd still love to know what he had in mind when he wrote that goofy title.  "New Atari Console that Ataribox?" doesn't even sound like an English language sentence.  I could have changed it, but it's so weird as it is that I've been afraid to.

It is a milestone regardless. I am sure the hidden posts are things that we really don't need to see.

 

PevZGzR.jpg.1f9f01a98007d2ac745cc7bd440efc48.jpg

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OH, by the way ONLY 1,599 pages 'till we hit 2600 ;-)

 

Granted if they keep delaying this thing...

 

We'll make it in no time, eh ?

 

2600.jpg

Edited by Woulfe
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1 minute ago, Nathan Strum said:

Fixed that for you. ;) 

No, that's just the Reader's Digest 'condensed'  version you posted, there's also a LONGER un-cut version that is set to music that's 18 mins +

 

;-)

 

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