Rocket Science Will Revolutionize Gaming!!!!

[Gabriel]

A couple of years back, I did some Ebaying for the purpose of acquiring a replacement model 1 SegaCD. I hit the jackpot and got one in excellent condition (minus the CD tray nameplate). It also came with quite a few games, none of which I was particularly interested in.

 

For the past few days I've been going through my old Genesis, 32X, and SegaCD games. I've been sorting them out, playing them, and rediscovering what I have. Looking through my box of SegaCD games I came across a catalog for "Rocket Science Gear."

 

I remember when the Rocket Science company was trying to make their splash. They were making one of those horrible interactive movie things in the same vein as Sewer Shark. But, the way they spun it, they were the second coming of gaming. I've rarely seen promotional stuff where it was so apparrent the people behind the scenes were so godawful full of themselves. These guys had one or two games coming soon for the SegaCD, but they way they told it, they were already bigtime stars.

 

All that could be forgiven if they had created decent games. Sadly, I've played one of their games, Cadillacs and Dinosaurs, and it is one of the worst games I've ever suffered through playing. I understand their other game, Loadstar, was a load too.

 

But this game development company wasn't the type to be held up by a little something like developing games. They already knew you wanted to live their ultra hip lifestyle. Or at least I figure that's what the rationale behind this "Rocket Science Gear" catalog is.

 

The opening has the following, epic announcement:

 

"A revolution is taking place. Is's a revolution fueled by a brave new culture of individuals exploring and conquering the emerging digital frontier. We call these people Rocket Scientists.

 

At Rocket Science Games, we have brought together some of the most brilliant creative and technological minds on the planet. We have challenged them to redefine entertainment technology. And to have a little fun in the process.

 

This catalog is your opportunity to join us -- to embrace the spirit and aesthetic of Rocket Science Games. The exclusive gear featured in these pages is not available in mainstream malls or hipster boutiques. You can only get it here. Just rip out the attached order form and mail us a check, or call us at 1-800-98-ROCKET.

 

Prepare yourself to experience a seriously playful new way of life. Make Rocket Science Games your reality of choice."

 

Inside the catalog one can find tons of t-shirts, shades, caps, and director's chairs with the Rocket Science logo. You can also find a voice activated watergun.

 

Oh, and, as an afterthought, you could order one of their two games, Loadstar: The Legend of Tully Bodine or Cadillacs and Dinosaurs.

 

It's kind of affirming in a way. Shit games and attitude didn't win the day. If only someone had figured that simple concept out sooner, then maybe the SegaCD could have had more of a chance.