Gabriel #1 Posted January 4, 2007 I saw this mentioned while looking at trailers on IGN and searched for an actual news site. I found the following: Utah Boy Gets Porn Instead of Madden for X-Mas and The same story with slightly more details and a little bit less of "videogames are evil" spin I find this notable because these cries of "porn" have been popping up with some regularity lately. Not too long ago there were a couple of alleged instances of trailer trash buying budget DVD players at Wal-Mart which "spontaneously" played porn. (The original DVD story was by a woman who actually claimed the porn started up in the midst of hardcore action the second the DVD player was plugged in.) It's interesting that these incidents all involved children being the first viewers of the pornography. And now we have the inevitable videogame incident instead of rogue Apex players. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NovaXpress #2 Posted January 4, 2007 "Found porn on a new high-tech device" is the new "Found a finger in my Wendy's chili." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paranoid #3 Posted January 4, 2007 Damnit. I never find porn in my new electronic gadgets... I always just get endless pop-ups and redirects asking me from my credit card... *sigh* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpendTooMuchOnAtari #4 Posted January 4, 2007 "Found porn on a new high-tech device" is the new "Found a finger in my Wendy's chili." I thought the finger was in a milkshake ....maybe it was chili. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thomasholzer #5 Posted January 4, 2007 the only thing i ever found in my games is a roger whittaker tune instead of game. most annoying Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JB #6 Posted January 4, 2007 I'm going to sue Sony because my Playstation didn't come with porn! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Crazy Climber #7 Posted January 4, 2007 "Found porn on a new high-tech device" is the new "Found a finger in my Wendy's chili." I thought the finger was in a milkshake ....maybe it was chili. It was Chili, didn't stop me from eating it though, I knew it was BS Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dusk2600 #8 Posted January 4, 2007 id rather have porn then madden any day of the week. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NovaXpress #9 Posted January 4, 2007 A hard drive full of porn would be the only justification for a gaming system that costs $600. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Breakpack #10 Posted January 4, 2007 A hard drive full of porn would be the only justification for a gaming system that costs $600. @ 60 gig,the PS3 wouldn't begin to quench masturbatory tendancies Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jess Ragan #12 Posted January 4, 2007 id rather have porn then madden any day of the week. Just as long as it's not porn starring Madden! "He's going long, folks... reeeeally long!" JR Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Breakpack #13 Posted January 4, 2007 (edited) id rather have porn then madden any day of the week. Just as long as it's not porn starring Madden! "He's going long, folks... reeeeally long!" JR He gives it to the tight end! Edited January 4, 2007 by Breakpack Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NovaXpress #14 Posted January 4, 2007 A hard drive full of porn would be the only justification for a gaming system that costs $600. @ 60 gig,the PS3 wouldn't begin to quench masturbatory tendancies Really? How much midget porn could you possibly need? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jay2068 #15 Posted January 4, 2007 I found a Girls Gone Wild DVD in a hotel room once. It was left inside the phone book! Was looking to order pizza and got a bonus! The guy must have been hiding it from his wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
causeican #16 Posted January 4, 2007 id rather have porn then madden any day of the week. Just as long as it's not porn starring Madden! "He's going long, folks... reeeeally long!" JR I THINK I AM GOING TO BE SICK That was not an imagine I wanted with my coffee first thing in the morning. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
+Random Terrain #17 Posted January 4, 2007 I saw this mentioned while looking at trailers on IGN and searched for an actual news site. I found the following: Utah Boy Gets Porn Instead of Madden for X-Mas If God gives you the gift of porn and you run to tell your parents, you deserve to have your nuts removed with rusty pliers by a greasy homeless child molester who will eat them raw in front of you just before he bangs your bunghole bloody. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joeybastard #18 Posted January 4, 2007 (edited) If God gives you the gift of porn and you run to tell your parents, you deserve to have your nuts removed with rusty pliers by a greasy homeless child molester who will eat them raw in front of you just before he bangs your bunghole bloody. Exactly. What kind of little wuss are we talking about here? He's 14 and has to tell his mom about porn? Edited January 4, 2007 by joeybastard Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MCHufnagel #19 Posted January 4, 2007 Unless it was reported somewhere else, was this "porn" ever shown to anyone else? The reporters talk about the game containing porn, but nobody ever says that it was shown to them or any other 3rd party. And did anyone check the disc to see if it is an offical one? This is a scam, like the Wendi's Chilli incident. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paranoid #20 Posted January 4, 2007 (edited) Utah... We're talking about a MORMON. http://www.ldolphin.org/mormon.html (I bet this kid is going to find himself yelling STOP! (in his head) quite a bit in the near future. "Heavenly Father, why have allowed these sinful images to be put into my mind? STOP!"). "Yell STOP... in your head, every time you think about sinning" is one of my favorites in the link above, although I am also kind of partial to keeping a record in your journal of every time you are "weak", with the warning, "do not show this to ANYONE". I'd need some clarification from the elders... "How does one record multiple instances of sin in a single day? Because some days, once just isn't enough"... "Should I keep a separate journal JUST for when I sin, because otherwise, I don't really have enough space in my journal to record much else..." Although still, the ultimate idiot teenager award belongs to the kid who let it get out that he was screwing his super hot teacher. The kid has every adolescents fantasy literally sitting in his lap, and he blows it... schmuck. Hot blonde predatory female teachers coast to coast will think twice now before having casual affairs with their 15 year old students, and it is all this twirp's fault. Somebody needs to give these kids a good beating. Where are their fathers? Edited January 4, 2007 by Paranoid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joeybastard #21 Posted January 4, 2007 Utah... We're talking about a MORMON. Although still, the ultimate idiot teenager award belongs to the kid who let it get out that he was screwing his super hot teacher. The kid has every adolescents fantasy literally sitting in his lap, and he blows it... schmuck. Hot blonde predatory female teachers coast to coast will think twice now before having casual affairs with their 15 year old students, and it is all this twirp's fault. Somebody needs to give these kids a good beating. Where are their fathers? 14 year old Mormons don't jack off? I don't believe that for 1 second. It's pretty much physically impossible not to touch yourself constantly when your 14. At least it was for me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
homerwannabee #22 Posted January 4, 2007 Utah... We're talking about a MORMON. http://www.ldolphin.org/mormon.html (I bet this kid is going to find himself yelling STOP! (in his head) quite a bit in the near future. "Heavenly Father, why have allowed these sinful images to be put into my mind? STOP!"). "Yell STOP... in your head, every time you think about sinning" is one of my favorites in the link above, although I am also kind of partial to keeping a record in your journal of every time you are "weak", with the warning, "do not show this to ANYONE". I'd need some clarification from the elders... "How does one record multiple instances of sin in a single day? Because some days, once just isn't enough"... "Should I keep a separate journal JUST for when I sin, because otherwise, I don't really have enough space in my journal to record much else..." Although still, the ultimate idiot teenager award belongs to the kid who let it get out that he was screwing his super hot teacher. The kid has every adolescents fantasy literally sitting in his lap, and he blows it... schmuck. Hot blonde predatory female teachers coast to coast will think twice now before having casual affairs with their 15 year old students, and it is all this twirp's fault. Somebody needs to give these kids a good beating. Where are their fathers? Ok, I am Mormon and I am not buying this article for one second. This has to be someone's sly attempt at humor. First, disassocitate from someone who has this problem? I guess people who go to A.A. or N.A. are total failures because they keep associating with people who have a problem. Or how bout going to kitchen to make yourself a meal in the middle of the night if you have a problem? Hmm, no wonder I see so many fat people at church. I think I am going to have to question skinny peoples moral integrity. Then there is the don't admire yourself in the mirror line I can see it now. "Man I look sexy, I am so sexy that I can't help but touch myself." Who came up with this idea Right Said Fred. I really love the tie your hand to the bedpost while your sleeping. Hmm, how are you suppost to stop when you still have the free left hand. Also, don't drink too much before you go to bed. Oh yeah, when someone really needs to go to the bathroom the first thing that is on their mind is masterbating. And lastly, don't pray to God about your problem because that will put your mind on the problem. Ok that is the stupidest advice I have heard in a long time. I can see it now"Sorry God I would really want you to help me with this problem but if I pray to you about it I will start thinking about it and if I am thinking about it I am going to do it, so I am going to pretend I don't have a problem while I am praying to you." There are just too many logical errors for this to be real. Either that or the most dense man who ever lived wrote this. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PressureCooker2600 #23 Posted January 4, 2007 Utah... We're talking about a MORMON. http://www.ldolphin.org/mormon.html (I bet this kid is going to find himself yelling STOP! (in his head) quite a bit in the near future. "Heavenly Father, why have allowed these sinful images to be put into my mind? STOP!"). "Yell STOP... in your head, every time you think about sinning" is one of my favorites in the link above, although I am also kind of partial to keeping a record in your journal of every time you are "weak", with the warning, "do not show this to ANYONE". I'd need some clarification from the elders... "How does one record multiple instances of sin in a single day? Because some days, once just isn't enough"... "Should I keep a separate journal JUST for when I sin, because otherwise, I don't really have enough space in my journal to record much else..." Although still, the ultimate idiot teenager award belongs to the kid who let it get out that he was screwing his super hot teacher. The kid has every adolescents fantasy literally sitting in his lap, and he blows it... schmuck. Hot blonde predatory female teachers coast to coast will think twice now before having casual affairs with their 15 year old students, and it is all this twirp's fault. Somebody needs to give these kids a good beating. Where are their fathers? Ok, I am Mormon and I am not buying this article for one second. This has to be someone's sly attempt at humor. First, disassocitate from someone who has this problem? I guess people who go to A.A. or N.A. are total failures because they keep associating with people who have a problem. Or how bout going to kitchen to make yourself a meal in the middle of the night if you have a problem? Hmm, no wonder I see so many fat people at church. I think I am going to have to question skinny peoples moral integrity. Then there is the don't admire yourself in the mirror line I can see it now. "Man I look sexy, I am so sexy that I can't help but touch myself." Who came up with this idea Right Said Fred. I really love the tie your hand to the bedpost while your sleeping. Hmm, how are you suppost to stop when you still have the free left hand. Also, don't drink too much before you go to bed. Oh yeah, when someone really needs to go to the bathroom the first thing that is on their mind is masterbating. And lastly, don't pray to God about your problem because that will put your mind on the problem. Ok that is the stupidest advice I have heard in a long time. I can see it now"Sorry God I would really want you to help me with this problem but if I pray to you about it I will start thinking about it and if I am thinking about it I am going to do it, so I am going to pretend I don't have a problem while I am praying to you." There are just too many logical errors for this to be real. Either that or the most dense man who ever lived wrote this. yay for joseph smith........... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paranoid #24 Posted January 4, 2007 (edited) 14 year old Mormons don't jack off? I don't believe that for 1 second. It's pretty much physically impossible not to touch yourself constantly when your 14. At least it was for me. I just did a value debate on Mormonism as a detriment to society. They've got some *effed* up approaches toward sexuality (making the puritans look like hedonists). It was the most awkward stuff to read, let alone to debate value over. To the Mormon dude, nope, I've seen this document on several legitimate LDS sources. I'll give you this much, there seems to be a bunch of different extremes throughout the church with no consensus on how to approach a variety of issues regarding human sexuality... from masturbation to homosexuality. Just remember, take quick showers, and try not to stare at your sexy schlong too long in the mirror, or the power of satan may swell up in you (heh... *STOP*!) and cause you to spill your sacred seed. I saw another LDS site where a Mormon, who was a police chief, was expressing GREAT regret because he didn't come to the aid of a brother in his church who was "outted" as a Megan's Law offender. Evidently the fellow eventually killed himself. It was this huge tract about forgiving and letting people be free after they have finished their punishment and, well... it *really* spoke of Christian values, even more so because the guy was a *cop*. Mormonism is crazy that way. Probably because they tend to *really* try to practice what they preach and consider the whole WWJD angle in their daily lives (as compared to other contemporary Christian organizations). Edited January 4, 2007 by Paranoid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NovaXpress #25 Posted January 4, 2007 If you want advice on the best cough syrups, just as a Mormon teenager. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
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